9 photos in galleryApparently Eva Longoria is dating Mark Sanchez of the New York Jets. The Jets lost on Sunday in sad fashion — words you could twist to apply to Ms. Eva as well, at times.
[Photos: Getty]
ALMA Awards Fugs and Fabs: Eva Longoria
Fug file: Awards & Galas, Fugs and Fabs, Photos, ALMAs, Eva Longoria
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Comments (47):
Aargh! Is Eva turning into a Kardashian?
My thoughts exactly! Especially slide 5.
Yes! I thought the carrot looked much more Kardashian than Eva. Although Kardashian would have been a white carrot. A parsnip.
You’re right – widowy or not, that black bodice in slide 3 is beautiful!
The rest are blaaaaaaah.
Wow- what do you even say? Not only is the first dress terrible, but the seam on the leg doesn’t line up and I keep feeling like I’m looking at her prancing around in pantyhose. There is a reason the hip/pelvis region of your black control top stockings is covered by a dress. And if you have to go sheer (which you don’t) you should probably made sure it doesn’t look like your dress is giving you a wedgie. I hope they glued that dress to her to prevent any mishaps.
I do love the idea that Liberace’s knife leave sparkles when it cuts, I need one of those! Also, she looks like she doing a Liz Lemon dance in #7, therefore I love that picture
Good thing these were all in a post about her, I totally would have mistaken her for (a super short) Kourtney Kardashian in slide #5, and Sofia Vergara in #6. Weird…
OMG, what drugs was she on??? The only half-decent dress is the carrot-aide one… Poor widow! And the chica is hot.
Was The Window Longoria always partial to black? Like even before she was The Widow Longoria? I can’t remember a time before she was always rubbing her and TP’s love in our faces. I swear at some point she had better taste than this.
Also, why do I get sucha sick thrill when marriages where the couple just cant get enough of each other (ie: necking on the carpet, tattoos to proclaim their love, giving marriage advice in mags etc.) implode? Clearly I am a sick, sad, bitter woman.
This is a first. I don’t like any of them. The Liberace knife one okay, I guess, if we have to have multiple costume changes, which we um, don’t. Pick one pretty dress that flatters and wear that. See, problem solved, and no more wedgy dresses.
Thank you! I’ve never understood the need to change clothes at each commercial break. Drives me nuts! (Underwood is the worst for that!)
wow, that first one is so unflattering. Her heinie should be very offended.
The gold one looks like those seat belt bags that were so trendy in the early 2000s.
Lovely bodice or no, #3 is a rehash of Demi Moore’s bike shorts.
Good gravy. #8 is like Seatbelt Fairies on Ice. I LOOKED like Beaker when I scrolled down the first ubernekkid dress.
Right?!
I looked at number 8 and thought to myself, “Goodness, is that made of seat belts?”
Fer cryin’ out loud Hollywood: I do not want to see a lady’s photograph and KNOW that she’s not wearing underwear. However, the worst part about dress #1 is that dress #9 is even worse looking…
If the photograph tells you that she’s not wearing underwear, then it also tells you she’s no lady.
Daffodil: you are so, SO right! I am happy to be corrected!
Ugh to all of it.
Why, why, WHY do women insist on tugging at the slits in their skirts? We know, you have nice legs. I believe the purpose of the slit is to let the leg peep out as you move. You might as well wear a miniskirt if you’re going to ruin the intended effect.
Who is her co-star and has he recently been on holiday to THE SUN??
That’s George Lopez and I believe that is his usual skin tone (he does get browner or orange-ier depending on where he’s been vacationing and/or his make-up artist’s mood)
https://www.google.ca/search?q=george+lopez,+images&hl=en&rls=com.microsoft:en-us&prmd=imvnso&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=x4FXUJiqFofo0QHPw4HIBQ&ved=0CB8QsAQ&biw=1024&bih=693
pahahaha I love you.
Wow. Those are all fug (with the exception of carrotade – loved that one).
I don’t get it! How can you pick dresses that are so uniformly fug?
Amazing. Nine different dresses for the same event and they’re all awful. She’s one-third of the way through pitching a perfect game for the FugTown Fug Sox.
My thought throughout all of these outfits was: “WHY does her tailor hate her midsection?!”
Please understand, I think she has a cracking figure, but NONE of these dresses are doing her justice. She looks like a box – even the second one which has a belt seems too tight and therefore unflattering.
I am perplexed. How on earth does one make Eva Longoria look shapeless?
Side-note: Is the first dress made of velvet? If she was going to do a dramatic floor-length velvet dress she needed elbow length gloves, a matching hair scrunchie, and to be in the 80s.
So odd to me that Kate Hudson recently wore a dress with sheer bits that was flat out stunning while Eva wore…whatever that thing was. And very odd that Eva managed to pick so many unflattering dresses. You would think one of them would work.
I kind of like the “Liberace knife fight” dress ::duck::
This just makes me sad. I smell desperation – but why? The Widow Longoria is a beautiful woman, why try to turn into a Kartrashian?
Didn’t her mother tell her not to show her tushy when she went out?
I had the same problem with Kate Hudson’s look-at-my-ass dress. Shift around a little, and it’s full-on butt crack.
Ummm…………..NO.
Good Lord, these are awful. What has HAPPENED to her?
And why is George Lopez wearing Amazon Women on the Moon hair?
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/an-eZoBYu7uh7t2/amazon_women_on_the_moon_1987_hair_looming/
The “look at my left (or right) leg” pose needs to die.
Fucking ugly! All of it!
I try to avoid mean comments, but remind myself it is fair to rip on ugly outfits if they are a product of tons of money, time and resources. If you are going to waste all of those things, you should at least look interesting.
Am I crazy, or does black dress #2 feature attached bloomers?
Oh dear…
Is the dress in slide 8 by Rami from Project Runway? The weaving looks like his, and I remember Heidi saying that the weaving on his dresses was something she hadn’t seen before. Still, Christian deserved to win!!! It was cute to see Posh get all giddy about his clothes.
No, I’m not turning this into a political discussion; however, with that said… I just read some magazine which she was on the cover of. Basically, the entirety of the story was about how she was **SO BUSY** campaigning for Obama in swing states. In looking at these photos, especially the first with her entire bum showing, I can’t help but wonder what impact her wardrobial options are playing on her support for Obama.
Who DOES this? Really? And has she met a sausage casing she doesn’t like?
Dress number 7 actually made her look heavy! How is that possible? She is a very beautiful woman, and these dresses all looked terrible! I hope she fired her stylist!
Ya know, if the only way you can get someone’s attention is by showing your ass, it’s time to just buy some Ben & Jerry’s and watch from home.
the black antler waves
on her ass
are rather repetitive.
ex-mrs. parker’s
obviously
got curves.
now she just
needs panties.
An open note to starlets:
Dear Starlets,
I don’t want to see your butt!
no love,
me.
If the dress makes your butt looked rumpled do not wear it!
UGH!!! At first I could have sworn it was Kim Kartrashian.. Good grief why do these women have to be so desperate looking? I wonder if they really are that desperate….
More like fugs and mehs. Or fugs and adequate.
In a perverse way, I enjoy it when perfect people manage to look so bad. Also, I want to start a band and call it Liberace Knife Fight.
I think most of these outfits are an Unfug It Up – there’s something (whether major or minor) off about all of them that could be easily fixed. I like the first orange one (in slide #5), but the skirt is weird – how can she walk in it? Also, the insanely high platforms can’t help.
My goodness! No wonder Mark’s dating her.