Author Archives: Heather

Cannes Well Played, Nicole Kidman

May 21, 2013 By Heather AT 11:00 am
36

Keith Urban has the right idea.

Just stand back and bask in the pretty. It’s potent enough for a contact high.

[Photo: Getty]

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Fug and Fab the Eurovision Song Contest

May 21, 2013 By Heather AT 10:00 am
115
Romania: Cezar, singing "It's My Life"
Romania: Cezar, singing "It's My Life"Romania: Cezar, singing "It's My Life"Romania: Cezar, singing "It's My Life"Romania: Cezar, singing "It's My Life"
43 photos in gallery

Welcome to Cezar of Romania. He may change your life. In a year when Eurovision felt low on enduringly pointless theatrics (no, I’m not talking about you, Random Viking; you were a beautiful mystery), the likes of Romania and Montenegro and, for ten glorious seconds, Ukraine, stepped up and tried to keep things saucy. I know the slideshow is long, but frankly, it SHOULD be longer. In a perfect world, all twenty-six acts would have so much insanity that I’d need four pictures per country to ably cover the madness. Come on, 2014. I know you can get us there.

In the name of expedience I’ve tried to cover the most obviously noteworthy stuff here; if something slipped through the cracks, please post links in the comments, and we can discuss it while I attempt to repent.

[Photos: Getty, screengrabs]

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Billboard Music Awards Well Played: Taylor Swift

May 20, 2013 By Heather AT 12:00 pm
32

Would it be out of place at Sochi 2014? Not entirely.

But I’m going to give this one to Swifty. Yes, it’s crazy short and it’s calling out for a triple lutz, but it’s also a) an awesome jewel tone, and b) super sexy, the combination of which feels fresh on her. There’s a welcome self-assuredness to that much blue and that much leg, which from the Queen of Omigosh!!! feels like a nifty step forward.

[Photo: Getty]

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Billboard Music Awards Fug or Fab: Selena Gomez

May 20, 2013 By Heather AT 11:00 am
48

I can’t tell if this is a case of Right Dress, Wrong Girl; right dress, wrong styling; or just… wrong.

The bright parts are fun, I think; I wish she’d gone with a lighter eye and a slightly hotter pink lipstick to play off them. The shoes are fine in theory but don’t deliver on any of the dress’s neon whimsy. My concern is with the rest of it. I feel like I’m seeing more contours than is strictly necessary, and I think maybe someone who has a bit more… authority… would fit the gown better. Selena Gomez is super famous, I get that, but something about her isn’t particularly commanding (yet?). Imagine it on a Miley, a Kate Hudson, even a January Jones. Is it better? Is it groovy? Or is it still just kind of a jumble of burst highlighters and torn paper, like a junior-high kid’s backpack?

Seal the deal:

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[Photo: Getty]

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Billboard Music Awards Fug: Jennifer Lopez

May 20, 2013 By Heather AT 10:00 am
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Jennifer Lopez
Jennifer LopezJennifer LopezJennifer LopezJennifer Lopez
5 photos in gallery

“HOLA LOVERS. I have a secret. It is why I wear windows for clothes all the time. Do you want to hear? Come close: I am bored. I miss Marc. It is so BLAH when I do not have to make weapons out of toothpicks, or build up immunity to rat poison so that my blood is always murder-y.”

[Photos: Getty]

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Billboard Music Fugs: Justin Bieber

May 20, 2013 By Heather AT 9:00 am
53

The fugpidemic continues apace:

Kid, I SHOULD BE ABLE TO SEE AIR BETWEEN YOUR THIGHS BEFORE THEY BECOME YOUR KNEES.

and there is more

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