Brooke Fugan

Satin is one of the toughest fabrics to wear unless you are built like a curtain rod. And formal shorts are, quite simply, cut from bolts of fabric woven out of the devil’s back hair. Separately, they are one occasionally toxic friend, and one flat-out evil bitch. And we had hoped that never the two would meet.

We should really know better.

Not only have they converged, but in the form of a strapless-onesie, to boot. It figures that fashion-challenged Brooke Hogan — she of that repellant shiny grill, which thankfully she is no longer sporting — would be the one trying to turn these two wrongs into a right. Alas, she has instead turned them into something too tight.