This is such a face-plant for me.
I just feel like… look, yes, we poke fun at a lot of the big statements that are crazy (Marc), or ugly (Florence), or so terrible they’re wonderful (hi, Sev), but we’d be bereft without them. This is the MET BALL, Heidi. We already know you like short skirts and long overhangs. You could wear this outfit in your sleep. I would not be surprised if you’d once worn this to sleep. And this isn’t even a good version of that theme. It’s a dowdy lace curtain, which is a stunning truth to tell about a dress that shows so much leg, and yet here we are. Do something else! Be bravely fugly, or battily fab. Have a little fun with it. Get us talking, not napping. Make Seal cry with regret. Although then maybe he’d end up raking in millions by writing a heartbreak ballad that gets used in every drippy Nicholas Sparks trailer until the end of time, so… maybe just make him prickle with uncreative regret.
Heidi’s All-Stars replacement, Angela Lindvall, went in a totally different direction.
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@VladaGelman How is Top of the Rock? - J
Met Ball Feh Carpet: Rashida Jones
Every time I see Rashida Jones, I think of the way Amy Poehler’s Leslie Knope addresses her on Parks and Rec. You know, like, “ANN PERKINS! You are beautiful and organized!” (Leslie is very into positive reinforcement of her ladyfriends, which is one of the reasons she is lovely.) Except I think, “RASHIDA JONES! You are beautiful and unnecessarily droopy!”
This is actually better in photos than it was in movement on the live-feed Monday night, but I am still consistently perplexed by how someone so gorgeous — sprung from the loins of Peggy Lipton and Quincy Jones, for pete’s sake! — so often looks so much like the conductor on the last train to Dowdsville. Do you think she just decided, “eh, how can I top Peggy Lipton? I’m just gonna wear whatever”? This isn’t bad. But it’s also not a home run. I don’t know if I’ve EVER seen her hit a home run. HIT A HOME RUN, RASHIDA. I know you can do it. Rashida Jones! You’re beautiful and rich! HIT A HOME RUN!
PS to Brooklyn Decker there on the side: your Shit, I’m Totally In This Picture, Aren’t I? face is hilarious. Never change.
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