Fug File: WTF

VMAs Fug Carpet: Nicki Minaj

Aug 29, 2011 By Heather AT 9:30 am
Nicki Minaj
Nicki MinajNicki MinajNicki Minaj
4 photos in gallery

You win, Nicki. Lady Gaga just looked like a refried Travolta with three days of body odor. But you? You look like if Hannibal Lecter got drunk at Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium.

Also posted in Awards & Galas, Photos , ,
react:

VMAs Fug or WTF or FTW carpet: Lady Gaga

Aug 29, 2011 By Heather AT 8:30 am
Lady Jo Calderone Gaga
Lady JogagleroneJoGagaGagjo CalderladyGo Jalderone
8 photos in gallery

By now, you have probably heard that Lady Gaga spent the entire duration of the VMAs in character — with excruciating dedication — as Jo Calderone, a dude who kept talking about living with/having sex with Lady Gaga and relishing in noting how different they were because she’s a FEMALE and he’s a MALE and all that, and then they would cut to Justin Bieber looking all confused like, “Wait, then which one am I?” And all I have to say about it is: Gaga, I have seen Danny Zuko, and you, sir, are no Danny Zuko.

What did you make of it?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...
Also posted in Awards & Galas, Fug or Fab, Photos , ,
react:

Fuglight: New Moon

Aug 25, 2011 By Heather AT 2:00 pm

So, when you’re Cameron Bright, a.k.a. “that guy who was in one of the Twilight movies one time,” you are kind of near the end of a very long list that includes R.Pattz, Taylor Lautner, Kellan Yutz — whoops, I mean Lutz, obviously — and Peter Facinelli, and that Jackson Rathbone person, and all those werewolves, and then all those other Italian vampires whose eyes are all red and hungry, and Bella’s dad, and, like, Third Local Yokel On The Left… it’s hard work differentiating yourself. So what’s a lad to do?

Be “that guy who was in one of the Twilight movies one time and then turned his feet into a portable zoo.” As if the shirt that looks like Mickey Mouse’s bloodstained hands making a pistol gesture weren’t enough. Good luck to you, kid. Apparently you’re also “that kid who was in that X-Men prequel,” and that’s a pretty long ladder to climb too. Hope your shoes don’t get caught in the rungs.

[Photo: Pacific Coast News]

Also posted in Man Fugs ,
react:

One Fug

Aug 25, 2011 By Heather AT 9:00 am

There’s something comfortingly grandfatherly about Anne Hathaway’s sweater here. Unlike when Cate Blanchett went full afghan, this tiny taste of crochet is just sort of huggably comfortable, and makes me wish it were sweater weather instead of triple-digit temperatures.

However, once you get this far south, you realize the sweater is the least grandfatherly thing about it. The last time I saw someone wear those shoes outside, it was either a) accompanied by a whiff of pipe smoke, a hurled newspaper, and a crotchety bellow to get off the goddamn lawn; or b) on Mickey Rourke. But THEY might not even be the biggest concern EITHER, because ANKLES WHAT?

Read More

Also posted in Candids , ,
react:

Unfug It Up: Zoe Saldana

Aug 24, 2011 By Heather AT 10:00 am

Well, there’s no arguing with Zoe’s face.

She’s very pretty. So pretty, in fact, that she elevates almost anything she wears. I say almost, because frequently I am very tempted to love her outfits even when they look — as this does — like a half-cocked bartender is mixing up a shot he calls the Krystle Carrington Streep. And just I was getting ready to climb on board with this, figuring it was a very modern-looking take on a potentially stuffy silhouette, I thought, “Well, but let’s at least look at the front.” Note to self: Always look.

lesson learned

Also posted in Fugs, Unfug It Up ,
react:

The Fug and Fugchess of Cambridge (Except Not Really)

Aug 19, 2011 By Heather AT 11:00 am

We’ve already discussed the atrocities of the Princess Catherine doll that Hamleys, the famed London toy store, put out a few weeks before the royal wedding. Well, you’ll be thrilled to know those people not only still work there, but have been allowed to continue sculpting rubber. Yes, for the low, low price of a hundred pounds — roughly $165 at today’s rates — you can be the appalled owner of these:

At whom are these marketed? Surely not at any of the Britons who crowded the procession route just to cheer their future monarch, and who were so proud and glowy and newly in love with the girl they’d JUST been ragging on five minutes earlier for having the audacity to be quietly patient. Surely not at any children, who would be frightened by Wills’ ghoulish visage.

No, I suspect the only people who might enjoy these dolls are William’s broken-hearted ex-flames. They’d probably enjoy playing with these, making them act out various argumentative scenarios in which, say, Wills asks Kate why her head is three times too large for her body, and Kate retorts that he’s really one to talk considering his chin-to-scalp distance is practically the size of his shin, and he’ll be all, “Why do you look like that empty chick who used to co-host Dancing With The Stars,” and she’ll go, “You’re one to talk — you look like Rob Riggle crossed with Kenneth the Page,” and he’ll be like, “MAYBE I LIKE THEM,” and she’ll say, “Maybe I do too, but not joined in some unholy cocktail where the product is some deranged-looking Val Kilmer-lookalike from way after he was hot in Top Gun but before he turned into Meat Loaf,” and then Wills will go, “Step off, woman, else I’ll tie you to that curtain with my man-sash,” and she’ll be like, “Not if I head-butt you first with my flat-as-a-mallet skull,” and then Bitter Ex-Girlfriend will make them fight so hard both their heads pop off and some local child picks them up and says, “Terrific, I needed new rugby balls,” and runs away much like this sentence has.

What I’m saying is, yikes. Can the monarchy sue?

[Photo: Splash News]

Fug file: WTF, , ,
react: