Fugger: Juliette Lewis

Fug Madness 2011, Round One: Bjork Bracket

Mar 17, 2011 By Jessica AT 9:00 am

(6) XTINA v. (11) CHERYL COLE

Surely, if you are reading this particular Web site, you are at least vaguely aware of what Christina Aguilera here has been up to of late, namely: promoting Burlesque with Cher, continuing to hang out with Cher, then falling off stages and getting boozed up. We’ve seen a lot of Xtina lately – remember her Globes ensemble? Also known as the night we all realized how much she looks like Snooki all of a sudden  — but allow me, please, to take this moment and remind you what she did this summer, while she was promoting her (non-starter) album:

Yeah.

And also this:

It’s nice to see a celebrity recycling outfits the way the rest of us do. Of course, for me that means I wear the same dress more than once. For her, it apparently means using different hot-pants to sass up her BeDazzled tights.

After the jump, A MESSAGE:

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Oscars Well Played, and Earlier in the Week, CRAZILY PLAYED: Juliette Lewis

Mar 1, 2011 By Jessica AT 2:30 pm

Okay. I’ve decided that Juliette Lewis is actually TWINS:

This is the good twin — the Elizabeth Wakefield, if you will. Well-groomed, charming-looking, BEAUTIFULLY-dressed, the person to whom you’d happily entrust the care of your children — responsible, mature, beautiful Juliette Lewis.

And then there’s the Jessica Wakefield

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Fugliette Lewis

Feb 22, 2011 By Heather AT 12:00 pm

So, recently, it’s been all party dresses and regular-person pants for Juliette Lewis, to the point where Jessica and I said to each other, “Well, somebody might not even be IN Fug Madness this year.”

Juliette Lewis

Guess somebody‘s ears were burning.

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Golden Globes Well Played: Juliette Lewis

Jan 20, 2011 By Jessica AT 10:30 am

I think Juliette Lewis has gotten a stylist; I also miss Juliette Lewis going out places wearing totally inappropriate Native American headdresses and loincloths:

But I can’t knock her for this. How cute has she become?

Sure, maybe her extensions hate her…

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Well Played, Hilary Swank and Juliette Lewis

Oct 13, 2010 By Jessica AT 1:00 pm

HILARY SWANK: Hey, everybody!

SAM ROCKWELL: I’m the meat in a HOT LADY SANDWICH.

JULIETTE LEWIS: Ew. Also, I’m almost unrecognizable when I’m not gallivanting around with curtains belching from my navel, right?

HILARY: But you look great!

SAM: I am HERE! LADIES! Pay attention to me!

JULIETTE: Thanks, Hilary! You look nice too. It’s hard to pull off anything resembling illusion netting with aplomb, but you seem to be managing.

SAM: I just LOVE the word APLOMB.

HILARY: Oh, Sam. I’m so sorry. But I’m wearing a bandage dress and Juliette is sporting strapless red lace. No one cares about you right now.

JULIETTE: Although we don’t have a beef with you in general. Would you mind….?

HILARY:….getting out of the frame so we can really talk about our outfits?

SAM: I hate you all.

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Fug or Fab: Juliette, Minnie, and Hilary

Oct 6, 2010 By Heather AT 8:00 am

HILARY SWANK: Oh, whoops, am I wandering into somebody’s photo?
JULIETTE LEWIS: YES. But that’s okay, lady-sister, you get over here and you stand with us and work your woman-heat!
MINNIE DRIVER: What I thnk she’s trying to say is, you can stand with us. If you want. If you dare.
HILARY: If I dare?
JULIETTE: Well, sister-dude, I mean, I might steal the show with my very pretty pink dress that looks like it might drop off my boobs at any second, or the shoes that look like my ankles were tied to my bedposts by a pair of silk scarves and I decided I liked it as a fashion statement.
MINNIE: And I look like I just got lei’d at a funeral home. But you… well…
HILARY: Me what? Is this not bright enough? I mean, wouldn’t it make awesome wrapping paper? In fact, for all you know, maybe it used to BE wrapping paper.
JULIETTE: That almost makes me interested.
MINNIE: Almost.
HILARY: Almost? Be careful what you say to me. I was a Karate Kid once.
JULIETTE: And I was a yoga-obsessed vegan colon-cleansing adorably cheerful nutbar once, who.. wait, I think I still am.
MINNIE: I can’t remember anything I was in, really. But I’m sure it was awesome.
HILARY: Fine, you know what? I don’t want to be in your picture. That would be too much  collarbone and neck cords for one photo and we’re all weirdly EXACTLY the same shade of fake flesh, and it’s creeping me out.
JULIETTE: Aw, wussy-pants! The glory of my inevitable nippling would dwarf your aura-field anyway.
MINNIE: And my hairy shoulder will shed all over your wrapping paper. So begone.
HILARY: With pleasure.

poll by twiigs.com

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