Fugger: Kate Moss

Fug or Fab Wedding: Kate Moss


First of all, I’d like to note that Kate Moss is so much prettier to me when she’s smiling than when she’s being KATE MOSS: SULLEN MODEL:

She looks sincerely happy, and that is the prettiest look for a bride, period. Also: those kids are super cute. I’ve decided I clearly shall have a wedding party full of children once Jon Hamm makes an honest woman of me. And I actually think I like the dress — it’s very her, but still glamorous and a bit retro. Also: SHINY. (I’m trying to judge it without thinking about how disgusted I am by John Galliano, who custom designed it, but it’s hard. I know they have been friends for twenty years, and that he was one of the first people to reach out to her after Her Coke Scandal, and I know that a person can be talented and TERRIBLE simultaneously, and that the discussion of how much an artist’s personal grossness ought to play into your assessment of his work is a very, very long one. But. You know. )

Anyway. All that aside, I was liking it…UNTIL:

I NOTICED THIS:

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Kate Moss for TopFug


[Photo: Splash News]

So, judging from this photo, I assume I’m correct in believing that the theme to Kate Moss’s final Topshop line is “Crazy Shit Only Kate Moss Can Actually Wear.” FABULOUS!  I will consider that some money well saved.

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Fug Moss


If PETA gets mad about you wearing standard issue fur…

[Photo: Splash News]

What do they do when you’re running errands wearing a wooly mammoth? Kate better invest in turpentine futures.

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Fug Madness 2010, Round One Continued: Madonna Bracket



(1) TAYLOR MOMSEN vs. (16) KATHARINE MCPHEE

Ah, memories. I recall the first time I saw this haircut:

[Photo: Splash News]

I thought to myself, “Wait, is Kelly Taylor in a cult AGAIN?” But no, it’s just crazy Katharine McPhee, starting off what would be an epically nightmarish string of hairstyles that totally obscure the fact that she’s got a lovely voice and a beautiful face, because seriously, who can pay attention to EITHER of those things when she’s wearing that fugly head-suit?

Or this fugly jumpsuit?

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Kfugte Mofugss


I don’t care if you ARE Kate Moss:

[Photo: Splash]

If I can see the curve of your bum hanging out from beneath the hem of your skirt, YOUR SKIRT IS TOO DAMN SHORT.

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Fug Moss


As I’m sure you’ve read, Kate Moss here has been getting some flack for saying that her motto is, “nothing tastes as good as being skinny feels.” Which I actually find hilarious because she totally plagiarized that from Weight Watchers. I hope she follows that statement by telling us that her actual motto is, “Call Jenny!” and then, later, that her new actual motto is, “a shake for breakfast, a shake for lunch, and a sensible dinner.” Eventually, I hope to get to the point where she is singing that irritating “1-800-GET-SLIM” Lap Band commercial jingle at every turn. I find it equally ridiculous because I would hope no one would truly look to Kate Moss for weight loss tips, as I suspect her secret to staying slim is a powerful combo of genetics and [REDACTED BY GFY LEGAL TEAM]. Also, you look fine just as you are. And as someone who has been on many a diet, I personally think that the occasional plate of macaroni and cheese tastes just about as good as anything feels. That being said, I would LOVE to know what life motto led to THIS:

“Nothing looks as good as wearing sheer bordello window dressings feels?” “Nothing looks as good as dressing like a widowed ice dancer feels?” “Nothing looks as good as sporting the tattered remnants of 1997′s Sexy Witch Halloween costume feels?” “Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em?” 

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