5 photos in galleryLook how stunning Rihanna’s face is. Doesn’t it make you wish she’d keep it toned down a bit more often, instead of being on visual caps-lock all the time?
[Photos: Getty]
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Fugger: Rihanna
Fugs and Fabs: Rihanna at the Victoria’s Secret fashion show
Fug file: Photos, Hot Right Now, Rihanna
Boringly Played, Rihanna
I know we tease Rihanna for her bad outfits, but seriously: If ever there was a night to bring the crazy, isn’t it the time you’re named Queen of West Hollywood’s famed Halloween Carnaval? Parenthetically, can anyone explain to me why they insist on spelling it “carnaval”? Is it supposed to be part carnival, part Carnivale? I object.
Anyway: I am stunned Rihanna went in this direction. This is neither a carnival NOR a Carnivale. I actually don’t hate the bottom half of the dress — the top part isn’t very flattering, or at least, it’s forgettable, but the skirt is at least something. Still, what’s with this lady ?She looks nutso every other day and then normal on Halloween. Shouldn’t that be flipped? her M.O. is all wonkus. I hope someone puts a de-wonkening in her Trick-or-Treat pumpkin tonight. And if not, then at least she should get a Milky Way bar. Because Milky Way bars are delicious and I believe everyone should have one. When I run for president, that’s totally on my platform.
[Photo: Getty]
Fug or Fab the Cover: Rihanna
This is the first time in a long time that I’ve looked at Vogue and thought the cover was compelling. The “I Love to Have Fun” pull-quote feels like it ought to be on the cover of Seventeen, but Rihanna is killing it in that dress and — as Tyra would say — she has mastered the art of the smize. In fact, I assume Tyra is reading this issue at home (eating nachos and wearing a caftan, because in my imagination that is how Tyra rolls off-hours) and talking about smizing RIGHT NOW.
Loading ...[Photo: Vogue.com]
Fug file: Fug or Fab, Fug The Cover, Vogue, Rihanna
Fugbrella
Riddle me this, Batfugs:
If Rihanna is wearing this at 24, what is left for her to wear when she’s 84 and living in Boca? If she’s blowing this now, she’s only got a muumuu left in her back pocket to sport out on the lanai with Aged Katy Perry (who will just be wearing a bathrobe and curlers). Everyone knows you can’t blow your Old Lady Lanai Wear too young, or it loses all impact. Think of the future, Rihanna. You don’t want to be forced to wear, like, surgical scrubs or a prison jumpsuit as an old because you already blew your aged wad. Hold something back for your golden years. You’ll thank me later.
We Found Fug in a Hopeless Fug
First of all, I am a little scared that the dude in the background is BOB from Twin Peaks. I know the actor is dead — I just looked it up on Wikipedia despite being petrified by BOB and thus almost unable to read his page — but I fear that BOB’s aura still roams this earth and you know what I have to stop talking about this now because nothing has ever scared me more than BOB and I am getting scared again. Second, I like this red lipstick on Rihanna:
Third: I was really confused by her red lipstick because up until one second ago, I thought her sweatshirt said CHAPSTICK. I was really amused by the fact that Rihanna was pimping out Chapstick. It seemed so reasonable.
Fourth: Things that are NOT reasonable: those boots, which are so shapeless that they actually make her look like each leg is being eaten by a python. Like she’s being attacked by twin killer pythons. (Note to self: write Rihanna v. The Twin Killer Pythons, sell to SyFy.) Also unreasonable: pairing those Killer Python Boots with that Ultra-Mini Leather Skirt really adds up to Animal Epidermis Overload. AEO is a serious affliction. I hope someone steps in.
@jesswithahat We cover it every year! -H
Fugs and Fabs: Women at the GQ Men Of The Year Shindig
Men, shmen! Dresses are more fun. We’ll get to the suits eventually, but whatever the hell Diane Kruger is wearing — plus the absurd raft of other famous people in questionable outfits — is more important right now.
[Photos: Getty]
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