"Except, lovers, you will not believe the suffering. NO TIGHTS. NO TIGHTS, LOVERS. I HAD NO TIGHTS. NO BLACK TIGHTS. VIVIMOS EN UN SOCIETY, lovers! How can I wear formal shorts without TIGHTS, except for all the other times when I do not wear them with tights? So I did what any other belleza with a razor contract who accidentally forgot to shave before the TV cameras would do: made a PA go get me some tights. But do not call me bossy, lovers. NO. Or as we say in Spanish, NO. This is giving PURPOSE to the lowly, lovers! This helping a girl earn her $9 hourly wage! THIS IS AMERICA."