These are totally the type of jeans my Dad might look at, cock a brow, and then say something like, “I assume they charge you per hole?”
[Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]
And of course, fifteen years ago, I’d probably have been all, “DAAAAAD, they’re TOTALLY IN RIGHT NOOOOW, what’s the big DEEEEEEAL,” because that is the way of things when you’re in high school. But now, after ages of buying jeans and feeling like I can’t walk a step in a store without bumping into a pair with a very expensive “distressed” patch, I’m starting to agree with the eye rolls. Especially when that patch is actually, as seen here, about ninety different holes. I mean, come on: Aside from all the reasons why pre-made holes in your jeans aren’t the GREATEST idea, how annoying is that in winter? What if you aren’t in the mood to shave that day? Do you have to shave AROUND where you think the jeans holes are, so that as you move about your day, no small animals try to take shelter in your leg shrubberies? I’m tired just thinking about it, so I shall leave you to discuss the merits or demerits of distressed jeans in the comments. After, of course, you vote in this very important poll.
Comments (66):
I am OVER this trend. However I am aware that as the mother of teenaged daughters who constantly ask for money to buy what I consider to be trash, I am a tad biased.
I remember purposely ripping the knees of my jeans in junior high in 1987…I wonder: if I tell my girls about this, will it make them stop wanting to wear the style?
Having lived for 40 years, I don’t understand why dumb, offhand ideas persist in the material world. I understand why they enter. Why not? Youth have to distinguish themselves. Widgets must be sold. Profit must accumulate. But why do they malinger?
Is there a mountain of rat-chewed denim lying in a gigantic warehouse in Guangxi? Is there a machine in China that was hauled over from Korea in the 1990s that was hauled over from Japan in the 1980s that rips holes in jeans and has to be put to use because jeans manufacturers have to recoup their investment in this wondrous machine, and jeans manufacturers make investment decisions the same way movie producers do? Is the unflagging presence of shredded jeans but one flank of the elephant of massive human irrationality in the room?
Now that I think about it, I can see slightly-disturbing-but-mostly -endearing Helena Bonham Carter & Johnny Depp presiding in a ridiculously non-exploitative way over a Tim Burton version of this Guangxi chewed denim factory. The rats, dressed in vests and ascots, will dance Bugsby Berkeley style, and, inexplicably, a much more pallid Fergie will sing and dance her way into our hearts as a selfless jeans-liberating orphan. She will ultimately ride off into the heartening, sunset-like glow of a nuclear reactor leak, on the back of the Elephant of Human Irrationality.
Leg shrubberies. YOU KILL ME! And yes. So over this.
Well I live in Canada, and we only really ever semi-embraced the hole trend. It’s cold up here. But then again I used to live across the street from a big dance club and I would see young girls in short skirts, bare legs and strappy heels standing in line in snowdrifts, so there’s no accounting for youth.
HEEEEEEEEATHER, you don’t UNDERSTAND meeeee! Everyone ELSE will be wearing them, and all I’ll have are these stupid jeans with NO HOLES AT ALL! I HATE MY LIFE! I WISH I WAS DEAD! *runs out of room, slams bedroom door*
Blanche, I totally would pay to see that movie!
Blanche, I totally would pay to see that movie!
Will never, ever understand why it is cool to look like you’re homeless. Especially if you’re over 25. Time to grow up!
Shirts are so slouchy these days that I think pants should look neat, to balance it out.
could be worse. I know someone who bought jeans without holes in them, and then cut them so there would be. When I pointed out that he could have cut up an old pair, he just looked at me blankly. Why? just why?
This has inspired me to consider an alternate career path. I want to be the person that rips the holes in denim. I feel as though it would be unbelievably therapeutic. I could also go by a catchy moniker like “Kathy the Ripper” with only the clothes of trendy rock stars as my victims. Perfect.
A few months ago, my mom created a knee hole in her jeans. But the crazy things is….she did it by wearing them for years! Crazy!
Seriously tho, can we please have non-distressed jeans back?
A few months ago, my mom created a knee hole in her jeans. But the crazy things is….she did it naturally! (you know, by wearing them a lot) Crazy!
Seriously tho, can we please have non-distressed jeans back?
I don’t mind the look of well worn denim, like the person loves that pair of jeans and has worn the crap out of them. Buying preshredded jeans just seems dumb. But then, I’m a mom in my 40s. It would look so desperate and stupid on me.
Maybe this means they’re done resurrecting the 80′s and have moved on to redoing the 90′s. Because that’s the last time it was OK to wear the jeans with holes everywhere. Of course, I came by mine honestly – I accidentally spilled chemicals on myself in the lab.
I’d like to see Blanche’s movie too!
Oh come on now. She doesn’t have to wear them in winter or when she hasn’t shaved. I’m 10 years out of high school and there are a lot of things I loved back then that I roll my eyes at now, but distressed jeans aren’t among them. If I own a pair I haven’t worn them in years, but they don’t bother me. I just don’t want to wear them.
I don’t mind “distressed” jeans myself, if they are done right. Which these are not. These are just randomly shredded, as if she did it herself to a brand new pair of jeggings.
I could get all preachy and talk about how young people should pay attention to what looks good and flatters their figures rather than mindlessly following trends, some of which flatter nobody. But then 10 years or so ago I was walking around my college campus thinking I was so stylish in my *cringe* plaid bell bottoms during the millisecond that they were back in style. Thankfully, there were no pictures, so my transgression lives only in the memories of myself and my husband, who still brings it up when he feels the need to question my judgment. So I’ll just say I hope this trend doesn’t last long enough for anybody not famous to get documented proudly dressing like a homeless person.
I’ve actually had nightmares about wearing jeans with holes in them and not shaving my legs. For this reason, I feel there is no need to purposefully include holes in jeans that could look just as bad ass without said holes.
I’m coming down on the side of “those jeans are bad,” but what I really want to know is what’s going on up top. Is Ferg channeling Janis Joplin but all her bellbottoms are at the cleaner’s?
Jenna: The other day I was waiting in the car for my 13 year old who was nowhere…I found her in the bathroom shaving her knees because they stuck out of her jeans holes! She said they made fun of her at school the last time for having hairy knees!
Yeah, I spilled acid on the knee of my jeans once too. Don’t really know what became of them after they were cut off me so the hole in my flesh could be treated. As you might guess, this look does nothing for me. Or anyone else, really. Why do people want to wear ugly clothes when pretty ones look so much nicer and make you feel good?
Is she wearing white socks? If so, IT’S ALL 1993 AGAIN. Holla!
Just goes to show you that you can slap a high price on anything and it’s “fashion”. The only people that have actual “earned” jean holeage are a) cowboys (and even then, they have chaps for protection), b) homeless people, who often only have one pair, bless ‘em, and c) those who have somehow avoided weight swings and are able to wear the heck out of their jeans for 20+ years. This look has outlasted it’s 15 minutes of fame about 2 minutes into it. Never understood it, don’t get it, never will. Seriously, people. END THE MADNESS.
I remember in the late 80s and early 90s, I had about three pairs of jeans that I had carefully ripped and frayed when they were new just so that they would look well worn and old. That was the thing back then, especially for little metalhead girls. Back then, I never liked the way jeans looked with the holes pre-made, because they don’t fray right and just look like they’ve been “done.”
That’s my main problem with those jeans. Oh, that and the fact that at 36 years old, no woman should be wearing distressed jeans, even if she is Fergie. The only excuse for ripped jeans at that age are jeans that have been broken in naturally and the holes are not enough to make one get rid of the beloved, comfortable garment. Even then, they should never be worn further than the grocery store or the dog park.
The last time I wore distressed jeans (holes begotten honestly, not by design)I was hanging out with society types (symphony, museum aux, etc.) and one of them raised a well shaped brow at me and said, “poor little rich girl!”
So Ferg, same to you my dear! And Blanche, well done.
P. S. FUG GIRLS BACK AT LAST praise the corn.
The last time I wore distressed jeans (holes begotten honestly, not by design)I was hanging out with society types (symphony, museum aux, etc.) and one of them raised a well shaped brow at me and said, “poor little rich girl!”
So Ms. Pea, same to you my dear! And Blanche, well done.
P. S. FUG GIRLS BACK AT LAST praise the corn.
I can appreciate holey jeans, having worn my beloved Levi 501s until there were more holes than jean back in the day. They could often elicit an eye-roll from my dad (and sometimes $30 for a new pair – YES, jeans used to cost $30.) But I can not stand this current trend of factory-made holes. It looks fashion-victimy & one step from stone-washed/overdyed. Jeans with perma-crease & bleach feathering across the front lap should also be abolished. How could this flatter anyone?
p. p. s. CURSES to you, double posting!
Oh…. I thought you were about to go nicely ballistic on _his_ dumpy butt….
She looks like she was attacked by a horde of chipmunks and won. She then skinned them and made a nice little planet of the apes vest out of them.
I find distressed jeans and Fergie have a lot in common. Both make me think “I can see a lot of skin here, but what’s the point?”
And I would totally pay to see Blanche’s movie. That movie would rock.
I find distressed jeans and Fergie have a lot in common. Both make me think “I can see a lot of skin here, but what’s the point?”
And I would totally pay to see Blanche’s movie. That movie would rock.
I’m 43 and have the THIGHS of a 43-year-old. Well, I’ve had these thighs since I was in my 20′s but anyway . . . . I would get icky bulges in bad spots, and the bulges would get cold, and I would forget to shave–just too horrifying to think about. I’ve never worn the holey jeans–do they have holes in the back?
I have a college-senior son who refuses to throw out jeans which are falling to bits until they have fallen entirely to bits.
He doesn’t wear furry vests, and he does wash his hair, which puts him two points above Fergie.
I have never been fond of the distressed jeans trend, but I’m not totally against it per se. I certainly wear jeans that have holes worn into them. However, they are properly placed holes, holes where friction naturally occurs. I don’t understand the logic of placing holes on the shins. Do they have any idea how difficult it is to wear holes in the shins of your pants? If the original intention of the trend is to have jeans that look broken in without having to spend years wearing them, why not have more sensible hole placement?
Is she in LA? Because it’s 75 degrees in LA right now, so maybe she needs the holes for ventilation
I’ve worn out lots of jeans myself and I can tell you that is NOT where the holes appear. They appear in the butt – every time.
Forget the jeans – does she still have that lame eyebrow piercing? That’s worse than the jeans! By far!
Back when this unfortunate look was still kinda new (2006), my 47-year-old-newly-divorced-remarried-to-tropy-wife-brother-in-law chose to buy a pair of these during an extended family vacation together in Las Vegas. I am so glad he wore them around in the casino that evening. I was so entertained by how ridiculous he looked that I paid for an extra couple rounds of drinks just to keep the party going.
Meh. Your dad’s right…paying for holey jeans is quite frankly, pointless. If holes were to occur to your “normal” jeans over time, then…*shrugs*
The jeans are so not the problem here…did no one notice the skin o’Chewbaca vest, the lank greasy/damp hair, and the ridiculous sunglasses? She looks like a homeless Valerie Bertinelli, circa 1994.
Oh my goofness… She is totall wearing white socks with that. GENIUS.
I wouldn’t blame the jeans so much as Fergie. The girl’s taste is in her mouth. She is clueless about dressing herself. I keep hoping one day she’ll figure it out but alas, she still hasn’t. As for the rehash of ’80s/’90s fashion, it just needs to stop. I even just saw an advertisement where the model was wearing socks with heels. This I remember from the late ’70s. When will the tacky madness end?
I was over these in the 80′s when I used to buy my own, bleach them, cut them, fray them, wash them, write on them and draw pictures on them.
When I was a teen in the 8 — mmmm….let’s just say “when I was a teen,” I absolutely wore jeans with holes in them and yes, yes I would put them on and then just shave the parts of my leg that showed. But then again, I was a kid and I lived in Arizona where it never got cold. Fergie is nuts.
I’m not the biggest fan of jeans with pre-made holes in them, but it seems to me that IF you must have holes in your jeans, then they shouldn’t look quite so orderly. The holes should occur naturally wherever your jeans get abused the most. What is Fergie doing that leads to holes on her shins?
I wore a pair of jeans with ONE hole last week… forgetting that it was about 0 degrees outside in good ol Wyoming. I think I frostbit my thigh in a nice circular manner. I guess Hollywood celebs don’t have to think about pants as winter protective devices, though.
I wore a pair of jeans with ONE hole last week… forgetting that it was about 0 degrees outside in good ol Wyoming. I think I frostbit my thigh in a nice circular manner. I guess Hollywood celebs don’t have to think about pants as winter protective devices, though.
My jeans get holes in the knees after a while, probably because I do a lot of kneeling on the ground doing crafts and stuff. I will still wear them to hang out on the weekends when they’re like that. But I’ve never bought a pair of pre-distressed jeans, and I think they look pretty silly.
I’m 24, if it’s relevant.
I imagine that in the next couple of years I will have to consign the holey jeans to walking the dog and doing chores only.
I remember making my own distressed jeans in college–even when it was not necessarily that cool in my school. I was either far ahead or far behind the times–I don’t remember. But now that I’m a crochety old 35 it doesn’t make sense. I know if I wore them I’d feel like mutton dressed as lamb. I was irritated when one of my favorite chains (Ann Taylor Loft) recently sent me something advertising their new distressed jeans. Ugh.
My jeans end up like that after a while, which I like. But I refuse to pay extra for it. Then again, I refuse to pay more than $20 for a pair of jeans.
I will only wear jeans with holes if the holes were earned. It takes a long time to wear out Levi’s, my friends, but it can be done.
Well, I guess I’m “too old” to be wearing distressed jeans, but I do it anyway. I’ve never been one to let age stop me from doing something I want to do. I’m middle-aged, and I still skateboard, lol.
I’m OK with stupid trends resurfacing but am strict on the view that if you are old enough to have indulged the last time round you need to abstain. Fergie is older than me and as a wayward teen my jeans were mostly held together by my fathers fervent hopes. Ergo she needs to stop.
Okay the jeans are heinous but what about the hair that hasn’t been washed yet in 2010?
If only my cheap old navy jeans would stop getting “distressed” on the inner thigh…
Sure sign that you are getting old: When you notice a hole in your jeans, instead of wearing them everywhere – and proudly, you actually throw them away.
Old lady, party of one? Present.
Forget the holey jeans, they are so over,I just want to know if that is hubby tugging at his tighty whiteys?
I think your dad’s funny. Wait, what are we supposed to be commenting on?
Can’t wait for Fergie’s next single, titled, “He Looka Like A Man.”
I totally thought this was Janice Dickinson, and that is all I have to say on the matter.
i NEED these jeans to be “in” right now because i seriously have only 2 pairs of pants that fit anymore and one of them is making it’s own fashionable holes.
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Hmm, I wouldn’t probably mind wearing jeans with so many holes. It’s not my style actually but I like how it looks on Fergie.
find distressed jeans and Fergie have a lot in common. Both make me think “I can see a lot of skin here, but what’s the point?”
And I would totally pay to see Blanche’s movie. That movie would rock.