Fug or Fab: Nicole Kidman

KEITH URBAN: I’m so very happy. I may BURST INTO SONG!

NICOLE KIDMAN: I have a wee secret.

KEITH: Just a moment, Nicole! I feel song coming on!

NICOLE: Oh, I can wait. My entire look is centered around the concept of coyness.

KEITH: Wait. What do you mean?

NICOLE: Do you really want to know?

KEITH: Obviously. Now, I’m intrigued.

NICOLE: Have you seen the front of my dress?

KEITH: Well, duh. I’m RIGHT HERE.

NICOLE: Check out the back:

NICOLE: See? PRIM in the front, SAUCY in the back! It’s like a mullet. Which I thought was appropriate, since this is the Country Music Something Or Whatever.

KEITH: The mullet as a symbol of country music is an outdated stereotype, Nic, but I love your grasp of metaphor and simile, so I’ll let it go. I am CHARMED by you! You have so many layers! Like an onion!

NICOLE: Yes. I do. An onion of talent. That’s me. Whether you like it or not.