Fugchel Zoe

Nov 2, 2009 By Heather AT 8:19 am

Heidi Klum’s annual Halloween bash seems like a place where anything goes. I mean, the hostess herself once went as a Hindu deity, and this year she went the whole ten yards and did herself up as what I assume is The Raven.

Looks awesome, but I’m sure after wearing that all night, she could’ve salted every soft pretzel on sale at Yankee Stadium. Quoth her sweat glands, “Nevermore.”

But, Heidi isn’t the point here. Rachel Zoe is. And at a party where it appears that you get the whole range of costumes from a whole range of people — Dancing With The Stars‘ Mark Ballas did it up as Jason Voorhees, hockey mask and all, and Rick Fox and Eliza Dushku went as Zombie Bonnie and Clyde; on the other end of the spectrum, various CW starlets went as Sexy Whatevers — this is the best that La Zoe could come up with on the big night:

I mean, there are some beads, and a necklace… look, I’m sure Rachel claimed this was SOMETHING. But let’s not kid ourselves. At its essence, this is just Rachel Zoe wearing one of her caftans, which she would wear any other day of the week, being Rachel Zoe With Stuff In Her Hair — or maybe Rachel Zoe Wakes Up On A Saturday Morning And Is Out Of Red Bull, or Rachel Zoe Stress-Braids Her Hair Because Eva Mendes Hasn’t Returned An Expensive Dress. Very evocative scenes for her reality show, I’m sure, but come on — this is Halloween, lady. There’s being lazy and then there’s just giving up, and I am pretty sure I know which one you did.

Also:

Rachel, your cat-eyeliner doesn’t hide the fact that you look SO SKINNY in this photo, I swear, if our photo source weren’t unimpeachable, I would assume your head had been Photoshopped onto a 10-year old’s body. Next year, can you please go as Rachel Zoe After A Meatball Sub Bender? You won’t regret it.

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