Fugstore Cowboy


I am shockingly bad at keeping Kelly Lynch and Kelly Preston differentiated in my head. Like, I know ON SIGHT which one of them was in Drugstore Cowboy and which one of them is married to John Travolta. Like, if I were a witness to a crime one of them committed and they were both in a police line-up, I would ROCK that line-up. But if, say, Lennie Brisco (RIP) sauntered up to my apartment door and asked me which of them, say, poisoned her hot au pair‘s fro-yo to punish her for seducing her husband, or whatever, I would be all, “uh, Kelly…..?” and Lennie would give me the eyebrow and be all, “a last name would help, lady,” and I would be all, “I DON’T KNOOOW.” 

Which is why I’m going to do Kelly Lynch here a solid and just start telling people that I saw Kelly Preston out and about in a heavily beaded sack from the Mother of the Bride collection at Cost Plus World Markets. You’re welcome, Kelly. But one day, I may want something from you in return. And these sort of favors don’t come cheap. So start saving, sugar.
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