Flashback courtesy of The Sarah Jessica Diaries: 2004:
“Yeeeeeah, I’m sorry. I’m realizing right now that the sandbox-chic shorts and the sleeves just sort of make me look delusional, like I think I’m a kid again. But… I am really whimsical! Younger than my years! And Matthew told me I looked tomboyish in this, which means I’m super hot, because for some reason, he gets really turned on when I downplay my feminine side. It’s just how he is. We’re simple! Playful! Why, just the other day, I came home and he and some extra from The Producers were wrestling on the floor! We love being playful!
“And besides, I was Annie when I was a kid — this is just adult moppet-wear, kind of like the blue knickers-based outfit Aileen Quinn wore in the movie version when she accidentally kicked Albert Finney in the knee and then told him to screw off with his adoption and his Tiffany locket because she wanted her real parents. So really, if you think about it, I look awesome and awesomely youthful in these evening shorts. And when I get home and put my hair into a ponytail, I know Matthew’s going to get so hot that he insists we play a rousing (arousing?) game of Robespierre/Young French Revolutionary. I’ve tried to tell him that most revolutionaries were guys, but… I don’t know, I think he’s just progressive with his fantasies, you know?”
Comments (48):
Ack. The dreaded gymsuit of 1968 PE classes.
My! That’s a kicky little brooch you have pinning that lovely polyester crepe de chine to your brastrap.
Oh, ouch. Can’t we leave Ferris out of this?
Please leave Ferris out of it! I’ve had such a crush on him since I was a wee thing! Don’t insinuate that he’s less than hetero!
Poor SJP. If you think that pic is bad, you should check out
this one http://www.sarafan.ru/pics/art1/sarah_jessica_parker.jpg
And also take a gander at this one
http://www.born-today.com/Today/pix/parker_sj.jpg
and this one
http://www.cinemorgue.com/sarahjessicaparker.jpg
Oh yeah, and ESPECIALLY this one
http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2004/06/11/puff_l,0.jpg
Well her face doesn’t induce self-mutilation in this pic so I’ll have to let her clothing slide.
The top half looks like my Grandma at a wedding, the bottom like a crack whore.
-Vanessa
tsk, tsk, tsk… evening shorts…
This outfit oddly turns me on. There’s something about those short-shorts, and the bloused sleeves that’s too hot. I love the color, and the fit is perfect. Nice hair, too. The brooch is small enough, and in just the right place to make it work. I wish she wasn’t cocking her head to the side like a dweeb, all self-deprecating. I wonder what shoes she chose to wear with this?
If just one female celebrity would wear a bra, JUST ONE, I would shelve all other complaints. It’s like they’re being forced to surrender their undergarments by some mysterious alien fame god.
Evening shorts are wrong. Don’t try it. Well maybe if you’re at an impromptu bar-b-q roof top drag queen party being thrown by your slut friend Samantha in the meat packing district.
And the top half of that outfit is a little matronly, don’t we think? Except for the odd shaped neckline that appears to be a direct result of that broach. That is a broach right? Not a big wad of double-mint gum?
Those shorts are kinda sleazy. And if it weren’t for her face I’d do her.
The dreaded gymsuit of 1968 PE classes.
The top half looks like my Grandma at a wedding, the bottom like a crack whore.
Haaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Yes and yes.
And of course 2004 was the year of Teal. Let us pray.
“I wonder what shoes she chose to wear with this?”
If she’s anything like Carrie Bradshaw, they probably cost $500 and have no thematic link whatsoever to that outfit. Like puke-green high-heel sneakers or something.
Jules – are you really Matthew Broderick?
GAH!! why isn’t anyone commenting on her horrendous posture? she looks like she has scoliosis!
I’m in my pajamas eating tuna and egg salad from a Tupperware container, so I’m gonna stay out of this one. Except for this: JUST BECAUSE BOYS DO THEATRE DOESN’T MEAN THEY’RE GAY.
I can’t say that I’m surprised by her utter display of fuggery. The poor woman already looks like a post-op. tranny, why would her stylist add fuel to the fire?
Wow, poofy sleeves, short-shorts, polyester/rayon AND bad posture. She’s supposed to be our fashion icon?
http://www.baddateclub.blogspot.com
I would like SJP’s style, if it wasn’t so formulaic, and if every woman who has cable didn’t run out and buy every piece of clothing and pair of shoes she was seen wearing. It’s great to be fashionable, but at this point her stylist has more control over her career and future than she does. I guess she does makes a good clothes hanger.
OK, now I REALLY want to know what shoes she wore with this outfit.
That outfit is all “it’s 1977 and I’m going to Studio 54 for the very first time.” Ick.
Was she trying to make her bangs match the neckline of her blouse?
The sleeves people. The sleeves! Does no one think of the pain that high school choir dress endured to become shorts and a top only to be forced to retain its hideous, billowy, three-quarter length poofy sleeves? The agony.
We used to play basketball against a Catholic girls’ school whose uniforms looked almost exactly like that (without the brooch, of course).
Matthew Broderick should have stayed with Jennifer Grey. At least they would have the whole “children of gay dads” thing in common.
I like the TOP part of her outfit thing. If it was attached to a skirt, I would easily wear it as a dress, no problem. But in a different color. And without the brooch. And, of course, I’m not a short, scrawny, untalented ding-a-ling, so maybe I would carry the “frumpy” look off better?
She totally stole that outfit out of my mother’s business-suit closet, from the back hangers that haven’t seen daylight since 1988. Except she forgot the skirt and blazer. And my mother rarely resembles a stoned llama.
so thats where my PE shorts went.
This calls to mind:
“I like your sleeves. They’re real big.”
-Napoleon Dynamite
You know, shorts and brooch are not generally items that go together…unless one is playing dress up. And, oh my Lord, I had sleeves like that on a pageant dress in 1982 or so. I was about 12.
“And when I get home and put my hair into a ponytail, I know Matthew’s going to get so hot that he insists we play a rousing (arousing?) game of Robespierre/Young French Revolutionary.”
Hahahahahaha. How do you THINK of these things? My meager wit is crushed in comparison.
I was scrolling down and really couldn’t see what was wrong. I thought it was just a slightly weird dress (very Debbie in Napoleon Dynamite)… then I noticed where it ended. I believe we need a full-body shot to receive the full fug.
She really needs to stop being held up as some kind of fashion icon. Just because a person makes bold fashion choices, it doesn’t always mean they make good ones. However, I think the color is nice on her.
sjp is one of those women whose looks always require a much deliberated description. helpfully, her outfits seem to have a ready made adjective, such as “stylish”, “funky”, or in this case “cute”.
I love how these women are given credit for what they wear and called ‘fasion icons’ and the like. The only time you can tell they picked out the clothes is when they look like this!
I have always found this woman trying too hard to be cute. She is very annoying. Men sucker to it every time, too, which takes my respect for you down a notch, Mr. Broderick.
Looks like something Mariah Carey would wear…eewww
ACTUALLY!!! She did try to pull that off at some type of awards!! I REMEMBER!!!!!
” Just because a person makes bold fashion choices, it doesn’t always mean they make good ones. ” True, but if you don’t make bold choices, you’ll never wear anything interesting. You take a risk and sometimes it’s rewarding and sometimes it is not. I don’t want to see people in little black dresses at every event. Boring.
I like how the picture perfectly captures the essence of Parker, in that (a) her outfit is inexplicable and (b) you can tell she’s saying something cutesie and self-deprecating and COMPLETELY FAKE.
I forget which award show it was that she came up on stage all “Oh, oh, I don’t know what to say, oh dear little me I’m so timid” in the least believable, most ridiculous way ever, RIGHT AS SHE WAS ACCEPTING A BEST ACTRESS AWARD. The irony was painful. It probably wasn’t a single incident, anyway.
She looks like she’s asking her kindergarten teacher for another helping at snack time.
http://www.cinemorgue.com/sarahjessicaparker.jpg
Thank you, to the person who posted that link.
I’d completely forgotten SJP had starred in The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
I love Sarah Jessica Parker with all my heart and soul, except sometimes her innovative fashions go awry and this is the result. She still can do no wrong!
If she wasn’t so damn ugly to begin with, I wouldn’t mind her fashion mistakes. But, please, ugly with bad clothes. It’s just too much.
She’s got something that guys like. My husband is crazy for her. I used to think that she was pretty cute, but now find her approaching-middle-age little girl act a bit annoying. He, however, does not. Go figure.
This looks like something she would have worn in Footloose when running around town and being naughty and having steamy lesbian sex with the preacher’s daughter.
Oh dear, did she forget that you have to get dressed for these events? poor thing…i honestly have never admired looking at her…or her ugly ass husband…i just don’t understand sometimes
Jeebus, that’s tacky! What was she thinking??? Oh, wait, she wasn’t…
Was she wearing Manolos with this outfit? Talk about the ultimate fug!
i have tried very hard to get matthew in bed, and i am pretty hot.. he is very str8
SJP has the ugliest nose I have seen in my entire life.
I have NEVER been a big fan of SJP, simply because she is UGLY. This is why GAP sales are going DOWN. Replacing her with Joss Stone isn’t all that great an idea either, but replacing her with anyone… ANYONE would be an improvement.