"I AM SUPPOSED TO BE THE SAILOR WHO RESCUED HER BUT LET'S FACE IT I KIND OF WANT TO THROW HER BACK IN THE OCEAN AND LET HER DISAPPEAR WITH ITS MOTION WITH A BOTTLE OF SUN LOTION AND TAKE AN AMNESIA POTION. I CALL THAT HAIR 'HURRICANE SANDY' BECAUSE IT'S WINDSWEPT AND RANDY AND KILLING MY APPETITE FOR CANDY. IT'S THE OPPOSITE OF GANDHI AND LONGER GONE THAN JESSICA TANDY AND THIN AND KINDA FREAKY LIKE GIULIANA DE PANDI. BUT SERIOUSLY STAY SAFE OUT THERE, EAST COASTERS. SEE? I FEEL DEEPLY."