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Fug File: book shenanigans

GFY’s 10,000th Post: A Thank You, A Reveal, And A Trip Down Memory Lane

Mar 1, 2012 By Heather AT 10:00 am

Oddly, we almost missed this milestone — it wasn’t until the middle of Fashion Week that Jessica and I realized GFY was coming up on a major click on the odometer, and by the time we realized it would happen mid-Oscars, it was too late to plan a fireworks display or a contest or choreograph a flash mob. We can’t believe it’s been this long, and at the same time, it feels like just yesterday that we were covertly putting up one or two posts a day at our desk jobs while also begging people for photo rights. It’s our honor to have pumped out this much content; it’s an even greater privilege that you guys have stuck around to read it, shared the site with your friends and family, and supported us when we needed it most — through births and deaths, Olympics tweet-a-thons, Sarah Michelle Gellar e-mailing us, the Fug Book and the debut of our first novel, Spoiled, and its attendant book signings, which were a highlight of our lives (we will never forget the girl who brought us a map of local Diet Coke establishments, or autographing pictures of J.Lo, Kindle receipts, that one copy of Don Quixote, and the pretty, pretty copies of our hardback baby).

And given how you guys have come all this way with us, we would — if you’ll pardon the pimpage — like to share with you something forthcoming that we’re super, super excited about: the cover of our next novel, Messy, which looks anything but.

Messy, which comes out June 5, 2012, is less a sequel to Spoiled than a follow-up. Brooke co-narrates, Molly is very much present and accounted for, and Brick Berlin still intones things of deepest importance about protein shakes and yoga, of course. But the other POV shifts to Molly’s friend/Teddy’s sister Max. As the book jacket says:

Now that Brooke’s caught a taste of fame and her movie star father’s attention, she wants to launch a blog that will position her as the ultimate Hollywood insider. But between schoolwork, party-planning committee meetings, and spa treatments, she hardly has the time to write it herself…

Enter Max McCormack, an aspiring author with a terrible after-school job pushing faux meat on the macrobiotic masses of La-La Land. Max reluctantly agrees to play Brooke’s ghost-blogger for an impressive salary, and the site takes off, but how long can their lie last? In person, Brooke can’t live up to the intellectual wit of openbrooke.com, and Max soon begins to resent hiding her genius behind a bandage dress-wearing blonde. Can the girls work together to stay on top, or will the truth come out and ruin everything they’ve built?

And LOOK HOW PRETTY designer Liz Casal made that cover. It will look so great next to Spoiled. They are kin but not identical, like the Deschanel sisters of book jackets. Or maybe Elizabeth Olsen and one of the twins. Or Beyonce and Solange, although to our knowledge, neither of our books will be wearing this anytime soon.

Thank you again for all the Internet and in-person hugs, the loyalty, and above all, the fun. Can’t wait to see you at 20k, although you may not want to look at me — I SHUDDER to think what my brow furrow will be doing by then. And after the jump, a tribute to the acting sisters who, at least in part, inspired it all. Sniffle. We’ve come so far, we lost them at a rest stop and don’t know where they went.

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Happy Birthday to Us! With Presents!

Jul 1, 2011 By Jessica AT 12:00 pm

First of all, Happy Canada Day to all the Canadian readers in the house (all of whom I hope are reading this on Tuesday morning, bored at work after an awesome long weekend)! Second, today is Go Fug Yourself’s SEVENTH BIRTHDAY. We are seven! We are in second grade! If we were a person, we’d have so many sleepovers and bike rides and Popsicles and library books to look forward to this summer. And speaking of books, in honor of our birthday, we are giving away SEVEN autographed copies of our young adult novel SPOILED, along with a sweet little packet of OPI nail polish — in I’m Not Really a Waitress, That’s Hot, and Yodel Me On My Cell (that’s a metallic red, a hot pink, and an awesome blue).

Seven, of course, is a lucky number. And Heather and I are so lucky to still be here, writing for y’all. To get sappy for a moment, I can honestly say that GFY has changed our lives in countless ways, and that we could not be more grateful to Fug Nation for making that possible. Getting to meet you (and tweet you) has been some of the most fun that we’ve had, and we truly do love you guys. No site has smarter, funnier, more attractive, better dressed readers.

On to the contest!

A reminder of what the book that we can’t stop yapping about is all about:

The closest sixteen-year old Molly Dix has gotten to the red carpet is watching it on E!; gorgeous, spoiled Brooke Berlin was practically born on one in Beverly Hills. Their worlds couldn’t be farther apart, until Molly discovers the long-kept secret that sends her spinning into Brooke’s orbit: They share a father, Brick Berlin, movie megastar and tabloid regular. Intrigued (and a little bit terrified) by her Hollywood lineage, Molly dives into the deep end of celebrity life by moving to Southern California — where Brooke is waiting, armed with a smothering dose of ‘sisterly love’… and a plan.” (Want to read more? Here’s an excerpt.)

THE CONTEST:

The first seven people to correctly guess the total number of posts we’ve published here on GFY, UP TO AND INCLUDING THIS ONE, but NOT including this afternoon’s Fugs and Pieces, win! If no one is correct, or fewer than seven people get it, the prize will go to the seven people whose guesses are the closest (either going over, or going under). Please email your guess to: SPOILEDBOOK@GMAIL.COM, and good luck! THIS CONTEST IS OPEN TO ALL READERS AND CLOSES AT 9PM PACIFIC TIME ON TUESDAY, JULY 5TH. Good luck! Enter as often as you like!

SPOILED Bay Area Events TONIGHT AND TOMORROW

Jun 16, 2011 By Jessica AT 10:30 am

Forgive us for repeating these, but we get a lot of Tweets asking for confirmation of the times, days, and places, so: We are here in the Bay Area today and tomorrow and we are looking forward to meeting you all! Where? When? How? Who? READ ON. And thanks again for your patience with us talking so much about Spoiled. We’re just proud of our baby and want it to live a long, happy life.

TONIGHT: Thursday, June 16, at Macy’s Union Square in San Francisco, from 6-8 p.m (actually , you can come any time from 4 p.m. onward — that’s when the fun starts — but Heather and I arrive in the Bar III department on Level 3 at 6 p.m., so if you get there at 4 and we’re not out and about, don’t think we’re just being divas. If you’re there at 7, though, and you hear someone screaming about there being insufficient gardenias in the toilets, feel free to blame us). Macy’s has loosened the rules of the purchase requirement, so here’s the official new deal: There is no fee to attend the event and just hang out and drink cocktails — yes, cocktails have been promised — etc. But, if you spend $50 ANYWHERE IN THE STORE, including on a gift card, you get a free, personally signed copy of Spoiled, and can come chat it up with us while we sign it. And the event is going to rule. We won’t be doing a reading, because you guys will be too busy COCKTAILING, having snacks, getting OPI polish changes from the nice folks from Pinkies, and watching models circulate in Bar III’s new clothes to listen to us. There’s even going to be a DJ! It’s going to be a really fun event, and we’re thrilled that Macy’s has so graciously offered to host us. So if you’ve been thinking that you need to pick up some new Clinique or some such, this might be the time, because your money will get you a freebie book and BOOZE and a hug. Or, you know, a handshake. Or a high five. Whatever. Finally, if you are sure you’ll be coming to this event, Macy’s would love it if you RSVPed to 1-800-786-2665. You do not have to RSVP to attend, but it helps, so they know how many snacks to make. SNACKS. We freaking love snacks, as you know.

TOMORROW: Friday, June 17, at Kepler’s in Menlo Park, reading and signing at 7 p.m. Come buy a book, ask us questions (about GFY, the book, sports, TV, Chad Michael Murray, etc), listen to us blab, and get a free bottle of OPI nail polish — in either blue, hot pink, or the OPI classic I’m Not Really A Waitress, a color much beloved by Spoiled‘s protagonist, Brooke Berlin. Come out and start your weekend with us! We will be high-fiving here, too, don’t worry.

SPOILED Bay Area Signings This Week!

Jun 14, 2011 By Jessica AT 12:15 pm

Hey guys,

First off, a HUGE thank you to everyone who’s come out to our book signings thus far! They have been fantastically fun events. We love meeting Fug Nation — and we’re excited to be coming to San Francisco and Menlo Park later this week! To those of you who’ve been asking if we’re going to make an East Coast leg of the trip, the short answer is: we don’t know. We would love to meet all y’all on the other side of the country, but at the moment, we’ve only been scheduled at events in California. When that changes, and we are trying to work something out, we promise we’ll send up a flare.

This week, the events are:

Thursday, June 16, at Macy’s Union Square in San Francisco, from 6-8 p.m (actually , you can come any time from 4 p.m. onward — that’s when the fun starts — but Heather and I arrive in the Bar III department on Level 3 at 6, so….plan accordingly, or whatever). There will be cocktails! For real! Macy’s has loosened the rules of the purchase requirement, so here’s the official new deal: There is no fee to attend the event and just hang out and drink, etc. But, if you spend $50 ANYWHERE IN THE STORE, including on a gift card, you get a free, personally signed copy of Spoiled, and can come chat it up with us while we sign it. And the event is going to rule. We won’t be doing a reading, because you guys will be too busy COCKTAILING, having snacks, getting OPI polish changes from the nice folks from Pinkies, and watching models circulate in Bar III’s new clothes to listen to us. There’s even going to be a DJ! It’s going to be a really fun event, and we’re thrilled that Macy’s has so graciously offered to host us. So if you’ve been thinking that you need to pick up some new Clinique or some such, this might be the time, because your money will get you a freebie and BOOZE and a hug. Or, you know, a handshake. Whatever. Finally, if you are sure you’ll be coming to this event, Macy’s would love it if you RSVPed to 1-800-786-2665. You do not have to RSVP to attend, but it helps, so they know how many snacks to make. SNACKS. We freaking love snacks, as you know.

Friday, June 17, at Kepler’s in Menlo Park, reading and signing at 7 p.m. Come buy a book, ask us questions (about GFY, the book, sports, TV, whether we’re paid to mention Diet Coke this much — although I can tell you now that we are not), listen to us blab, and get a free bottle of OPI nail polish — in either blue, hot pink, or the OPI classic I’m Not Really A Waitress, a color much beloved by Spoiled‘s protagonist, Brooke Berlin. Who, it must be said, would never even pretend to be a waitress, unless a cute boy were involved. Or a nefarious plot of some sort. Or it were an acting challenge… okay, she might pretend to be a waitress, but not if it involved actual waitressing. We’ll ponder that question between now and then. Regardless, we cannot wait to explore this awesome indie bookstore, and we’d be honored if you started your weekend with us!

Book Signing Tonight!

Jun 7, 2011 By Jessica AT 10:30 am

Just a handy reminder that Heather and I will be at the amazing CHAUCER’S BOOKSTORE in Santa Barbara TONIGHT, at 7 p.m., to read and sign copies of SPOILED! Buy a book, get an awesome OPI nail polish! Come chat us up! We had a great reader Q&A at Barnes and Noble on Sunday — everyone was hilarious and delightful, and, memorably, one of Fug Nation asked us who we thought would win in the following cage matches: Elizabeth Wakefield vs Kelly Taylor, and Jessica Wakefield vs. Brenda Walsh. (For the record, we agreed that Kelly would SLAUGHTER Elizabeth, and that Jessica v. Brenda [a poignant match for me, as I am named Jessica and my doppelganger here at GFY is Brenda, so this was truly asking me to ponder how I could best destroy myself] would be an incredibly close match that Brenda would barely win.) You guys are fun to hang out with. So come say hi tonight, if you’re in the SB environs!

PS: If you’re not in the SB environs, we’ll be at Vroman’s in Pasadena on Saturday at noon; the Union Square Macy’s in San Francisco on the 16th from 6-8 p.m.; and Kepler’s in Menlo Park on the 17th at 7 p.m.!

Today’s the Day to Get SPOILED

Jun 1, 2011 By Jessica AT 10:30 am

Guess what’s officially out today, just in time for your summer reading? That’s right: Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire. WHAT UP, ROMANS?!

Oh, wait. That’s not today. Today is the publication day — the birthday! — of our young adult novel, Spoiled:

We’ve been talking about it a lot lately — thanks so much for your patience with that, by the way, but we have a feeling you understand — and we’re so, so excited for you guys to finally read it! What’s it about?

“The closest sixteen-year old Molly Dix has gotten to the red carpet is watching it on E!; gorgeous, spoiled Brooke Berlin was practically born on one in Beverly Hills. Their worlds couldn’t be farther apart, until Molly discovers the long-kept secret that sends her spinning into Brooke’s orbit: They share a father, Brick Berlin, movie megastar and tabloid regular. Intrigued (and a little bit terrified) by her Hollywood lineage, Molly dives into the deep end of celebrity life by moving to Southern California — where Brooke is waiting, armed with a smothering dose of ‘sisterly love’… and a plan.”

Want to read more? Here’s an excerpt.

Want to buy it? Please do! You can get it at Target, at Sam’s Club, at your local indie bookstore, at Barnes and Noble, and at Amazon! It’s on the Nook, the Kindle, and the iBooks store! If you show up at my house in the middle of the night, I’ll probably throw one at your head!

Want to come meet us at a book signing and get some awesome OPI nail polish? We can totally make that happen! Please come out and meet us:

June 5 at the Santa Monica Promenade Barnes and Noble. We’ll be doing a reading and signing at 2 p.m. That’s THIS SUNDAY! Come on down and meet us, and then enjoy the glorious Santa Monica ocean breezes. Ooh, you could go to the pier afterwards and ride the roller coaster — or the carousel, which perhaps you may remember from that episode of Beverly Hills, 90210,where Andrea offered Brandon the precious flower of her virginity when she thought he was leaving town.

June 7 at Chaucer’s in Santa Barbara. Reading and signing at 7 p.m. This is one of the best indie bookstores around — I have very fond memories of stopping here on trips up the coast. Come on by and meet us there! No one will be offering anyone her virginity. Well, as far as we know. I guess what you guys do in the parking lot is your own business.

June 11 at Vroman’s in Pasadena. Reading and signing at noon. This is the bookstore which I visited nearly every single weekend of my girlhood, so it’s an extra special stop on our Unofficial Book Signing Non-Tour. Bonus proximity to Pasadena’s Paseo, and Old Town, a.k.a.: myriad places for you to get snacks and cocktails afterward.

June 16 at Macy’s Union Square in San Francisco, from 6-8 p.m. We won’t be doing a reading at this event, because you guys will be too busy DRINKING COCKTAILS and getting OPI polish changes from the nice folks from Pinkies to listen to us. There’s even going to be a DJ – shopping, drinking, music, nail polish? This is going to be an amazing bash. Please do note that that Macy’s has set a purchase requirement — a $50 purchase gets you a free, personally signed book (and, of course, a meet and greet).

June 17 at Kepler’s in Menlo Park, reading and signing at 7 p.m. Stop two in the Bay Area, at an awesome indie bookstore. We’d be honored if you’d come out and start your weekend with us!