Fug File: green

Golden Globes Well Played: Mila Kunis

Jan 19, 2011 By Jessica AT 7:30 am

MORE GREEN! I loved this one:

Especially after reviewing Mila’s last year of red carpet outfits, most of which were some kind of neutral. In comparison, this is some kind of WONDERFUL HAHAHAHAH SEE WHAT I DID THERE oh God Globes fever has set in. It SOUNDS fun, but it actually leads to hacky cracks like that, as well as a painful rash. Ahem. I apologize.

What I Mean Is, It’s Great

Fug file: Awards & Galas, Well Played, , , ,
react:

Golden Globes Fug Carpet: Well Played, Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones

Jan 18, 2011 By Heather AT 3:00 pm

Did anyone not tear up a little when Michael Douglas and CZJ swept onto the red carpet together?

Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones

Tears over him, because he’s reportedly beaten his throat cancer — tears I also shed, I might add, when everyone gave him a standing ovation as he walked out on stage, to which he humbly replied something akin to, “There has to be an easier way to get a standing ovation” — and tears over her, because well, it would be pretty bad-ass to be her. Look at her owning that thing. It’s massive. It’s mossy. It’s textured. It’s drapey. And it’s kind of fan-freaking-tastic on her. She knows it, too. Her face says, “Yes, that’s right. My husband beat cancer, and I beat all these other bitches in green, and you will be looking at me EVERY SINGLE TIME you catch sight of even a tiny strip of this dress on the screen. And you will LIKE IT, because I am Catherine Zeta-Jones, and I am still the reigning Most Pregnant Woman Ever To Haul Ass Up Onto An Awards Stage And Carry Off A Trophy, and admit it, you thought I was going to go into labor right then and there and have Jack Nicholson cut the cord. But I didn’t, because I am SO FABULOUS that my cervix actually obeys my orders.”

In other words, I really like that dress.

Fug file: Awards & Galas, Well Played, , , ,
react:

Golden Globes Fug or Fab: Elisabeth Moss

Jan 17, 2011 By Jessica AT 3:30 pm

PROS: I love this color on her, like, A LOT:

And the neckline and bodice are charming. But I am legitimately kind of confused by the hips: to me, it looks like they have very intricate pleats, which she’s kind of screwed up by continually posing with her hands on them. So it’s gotten kind of Wrinkled McPerplexing, when it probably looked amazing on the dress form (I think this is a custom Donna Karan, so I can’t find a shot of it on a model to compare).

And the back is a concern:

Fug file: Awards & Galas, Fug or Fab, , ,
react:

Golden Globes Well Played: Angelina Jolie

Jan 17, 2011 By Heather AT 11:00 am
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
Angelina Jolie and Brad PittAngelina Jolie and Brad PittAngelina Jolie and Brad PittAngelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
5 photos in gallery

BRAD: YOOOOO, Brangie!

ANGELINA: Technically I’m just Angie.

BRAD: Whatever, baby girl, we are as one. But if you want to go there, then fine — call me B.Pittz.

ANGELINA: And why would I do that?

BRAD: Because I am HAPPENING tonight. This funkball is the JAM.

ANGELINA: I don’t understand those words in that order.

BRAD: B.Pittz is in the HIZ, baby, and my lingo is the SHIZ, Miz!

ANGELINA: And I don’t understand those words at all.

BRAD:  …Yeah, I learned them from the kids. That Shiloh has a mouth.

ANGELINA: Let’s stop wasting time on that and talk about me. I’m wearing a color, Brad.

BRAD: You’re what?

ANGELINA: I’m WEARING a COLOR.

BRAD: You’re wearing a collar? Like a dog?

ANGELINA: A COLOR. I AM WEARING A COLOR.

BRAD: Now I don’t understand those words in that order.

ANGELINA: I know. I think the earth fell off its axis.

Fug file: Awards & Galas, Dialogues, Photos, Well Played, , , ,
react:

Fug or Fab: Brenda Song

Jan 10, 2011 By Heather AT 10:00 am

So, apparently Disney’s Brenda Song is in The Social Network. I had no idea. I bet Miley Cyrus is sitting around somewhere putting pins in a Brenda Song doll while copies of her movie The Last Song burn in her fireplace. (Also, when I first published this entry today, I had called her Brenda Strong. In fact, Brenda Strong is the dead narrator on Desperate Housewives and The Braless Wonder from Seinfeld. NOT THE SAME. DON’T GET ANY IDEAS, BRENDA SONG.)

Or maybe Miley is using them to do fashion voodoo. Because while Brenda looks perfectly cute in this shiny — if a tad too micro for her — little black dress, she also wore this recently:

It Ain’t Easy Being Green

Fug file: Fug or Fab, , ,
react:

Well Played, Wino Forever

Jan 7, 2011 By Heather AT 1:00 pm

Winona’s last few appearances on the red carpet have been tragic. Or at least semi-tragic. So this warmed the cockles of my heart, which are usually kept at a very frosty sub-freezing temperature:

It’s really simple, yes, but it’s the best combination of soft and flattering that she’s sported in a long time. And now I want to go watch Heathers again. Although really, it does not take much to get me to want to watch Heathers – death by Drano, Shannen Doherty, “I love my dead gay son,” and Martha Dumptruck, and… well, it’s all so very, you know? It’s a BIGGER deal that this makes me want to watch Reality Bites, the movie that in my youth I thought was very funny, and in my current state of adult decrepitude makes me want to scream at people about wearing bras, getting a goddamn job, washing their hair (I’m looking at you, Ethan Hawke), and not being pretentious assheads (ditto). Like, when you start rooting for the Taye Diggs character in Rent, and Ben Stiller in Reality Bites, and you cheer for Janeane Garofalo in that movie when she tries to get Wino a job at The Gap, you know you’re inching outside the target demographic. Although, I like to think of it as wisdom. PAY THE RENT, PEOPLE. Pay for your Snickers. God.

Fug file: Well Played, ,
react: