Fug File: SIGH

Lady Fugga

Sep 9, 2009 By Heather AT 1:17 pm

So we’ve gone from a willful lack of pants and do-it-yourself nipple shields… to this:

It’s like one part Madonna, one part Liberace, a sprinkling of Liza Minnelli, a droplet of Joan Collins, all thrown in a blender and frosted with a divine icing made of this:

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Fuggis Fugton

Aug 27, 2009 By Heather AT 1:58 pm

[Photo: Splash News]

“Dear Diary,

OMG I am a genius. One word: Mile-high club. Two words: LEGGINGS WITH BUILT-IN KNEEPADS. Three words: AWESOME. Or is that also only two words? I don’t know. All I know is, I don’t have any bruises, Diary! Well, maybe a few, but they don’t make leggings with pads there. VICTORY. I can’t wait to tell Nicky. She is going to be so jealous, once she stops lecturing me and really stops to THINK about it.

Come Fky My Friendly Skies,
P”

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Fuglycat Dolls

Jul 22, 2009 By Heather AT 9:18 am

I never understood why everyone flipped out about Kate Gosselin’s haircut. Yes, it’s not great, but it’s also not the first of its kind. Posh Spice did it long before the reverse-mullet was even a glint in Kate’s eye, and even Kimberly Wyatt — who I know is of The Pussycat Dolls only because that’s what the Internet keeps insisting — beat her to it.

Hopefully this is not an ongoing pattern for them wherein Kate picks up their messy thirds. Because we all know Posh has gone pantsless before, and sure enough, here comes Kimmy:

[Photo: Splash News]

That’s not a shirt. That’s two flannel pillowcases pinned together at the shoulders. I’ve seen infants in more full-coverage outfits, and half of their ensembles involve the word “Pampers.” Please, Kate Gosselin, do not pick up this cue from your hair twin. I already accidentally saw paparazzi photos of you flashing your underwear; I do not need any more of you (or your odious ex) in my life.

But, back to Kimberly Wyatt: Based on the facial expression of the woman behind her, I have a sneaking suspicion that Kimberly here is using those tights as trousers, espousing the tragic “you can’t spell ‘panty hose’ without ‘pants’” school of thought. Let’s take a look-see:
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ESPYs Fug Carpet: Nastia Liukin

Jul 16, 2009 By Heather AT 10:20 am

At first, I thought this picture was of Stephanie Pratt. That’s neither here nor there; it just struck me funny, because in general, I don’t think gymnast and onetime sweetheart of our nation Nastia Liukin actually resembles the She-Pratt much at all.

ANYWAY:

It is a crying shame that a girl like Nastia, who’s been a special guest in Fashion Week’s front rows, got stuck with a dress that appears to have a built-in baby sling. Maybe she’s trying to make some extra scratch as an on-site nanny: All the convenience of wearing your infant yourself, but with none of the back pain. Brilliant.
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Fug You

Jul 13, 2009 By Heather AT 10:13 am

I’m sure it’s very difficult these days for some singers to compete with the likes of Katy Perry and Lady Gaga, for whom every appearance on-stage — and off, usually, also — is an excuse to dress like they’ve been using crack rock as ice cubes in their diet sodas before licking the backs of South American cane toads and sniffing glue.

So it’s really nice to see Lily Allen refusing to pander.

[Photo: Splash News]

I mean, you can’t even SEE her crotch! It’s practically prude!

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Fugger Pains

Jul 9, 2009 By Heather AT 10:19 am

You can run, Linds, but you can’t hide. We know it’s you. Why?

[Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

Because ONLY YOU would take the twin obsessions of spandex and self-tanner so far as to paint yourself a pair of FLESH LEGGINGS.

It’s so ridiculous that I can’t even be bothered to rag on your rubber dress, or the fact that I think you bought that bag at the Franchise Glitz Dealer they go to in Xanadu. Yes, flesh leggings may have broken me. Seek help, and I will do the same.

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