On the up side, Jessie J took the time to accessorize her broken foot. On the down side, the rest of her is wearing accessories ONLY.
Fug File: VMAs
It bums me out when Miley shows up places like the VMAs dressed like she’s the 75 year old grande dame of the evening, and she’s attending the opening of the Met, and not the VIDEO FREAKING MUSIC FREAKING AWARDS. GIRL. If EVER there were a time to take us to Leg City, it’s at the VMAs! The VMAs are all about being the Hot Young Thing, not wearing something that makes you look like you just climbed out of a moldering grave.
Speaking of graves, there’s GOT to be a way to bring this dress back from the dead. I feel like even a change in color might help, right? Maybe. Maybe lose the sleeves? I dunno — you’re the experts, so head into the comments and let us know how you’d revive this look. And to make it extra entertaining, please tell us in haiku. (5/7/5 syllables. Y’all know the drill.) We’ll pick our favorite, and the winner will get a $100 iTunes gift certificate. The last few times we’ve run this kind of contest, the entries have been awesome, and who doesn’t love free music? We can’t wait to see what you come up with. Good luck! The contest ends on Tuesday night, at 10pm Pacific.
This particular Unfug It Up is sponsored by MTV’s new comedy/horror show, Death Valley, which we’ve read described as sort of True Blood meets Reno 911. It’s about Los Angeles after a post-zombie/werewolf/zombie apocalypse and the police task force in charge of fighting the undead — including a dude amusingly named John “John-John” Johnson, and the girl who played Ben Linus’s daughter on Lost. It premieres tonight at 10:30 p.m. Eastern/9:30 p.m. Central, and it’s apparently gory enough to require a viewer-discretion warning, which is a good sign for a horror show. Curious? You can view the trailer here. Maybe it will inspire you with a way to help ol’ Miley here resurrect this thing.
Because this is a contest, there are some rules/disclaimers set by the Powers That Be, and they are: This contest is for valid U.S. Citizens only. Only one entry per person. The winner may not request a prize substitution. Thank you, and have fun!
It occurs to me now who Justin Bieber is: He’s Amanda Bynes in She’s The Man. With equally improbable success with the ladies.
You win, Nicki. Lady Gaga just looked like a refried Travolta with three days of body odor. But you? You look like if Hannibal Lecter got drunk at Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium.
Let’s be honest: all y’all figured that when MTV finally got around to giving me some kind of tribute it would be because I was DEAD but here I am and sure I’m wearing ruffled formal shorts but DEAD I AM NOT even though at some points tonight I kinda wished I was. Let’s review: