VMAs: Fugs So Good

This picture raises so many questions for me:

A) Did Amy Lee not get the memo about how Uggs are over? And about how they make girls with calves look like they’ve got mega-cankles and stumpy legs? And about how, at any rate, they’re not appropriate for any event fancier than “Hon, I’m running down to the Piggly Wiggly for some cigs. Do you need anything?”

B) Didn’t Elaine Irwin tell John [Cougar] Mellencamp that he probably ought to change out of his Dad Jeans and into a suit? Because John [Cougar] Mellencamp looks like he was just lolling in the hammock in his back yard in Indiana reading a book about poker and drinking a beer while his kids ran through the sprinklers. Which is a nice and completely defensible look — when you’re in the hammock in your back yard in Indiana reading a book and drinking a beer.

C) In his defense, John [Cougar] Mellencamp looks totally confused about what he’s doing, who he’s standing next to, and why he even agreed to get out of his hammock in the first place. Damn it, he forgot to turn the sprinklers off.

D) John? Everyone misses the “Cougar.”