"Finally someone found me a decent weave, y'all. It's only been like SIX YEARS. I could have GROWN this hair in the time it took someone to find this hair and sew it to my head, is what I am saying. So hello. It took you long enough. But aren't you glad I am at this event and not dead and not in jail and not Lindsay Lohan and not Paris Hilton and not that other one or that other other one? I thought so.
LOVE BRITNEY
PS: I didn't mention JUSTIN AT ALL.