The thing is, I am pretty sure I have a guess at who will win this one, but then again, Fug Nation can be full of surprises. So let’s get started on what Iron Chef would call “Battle Panty.”
First up: Australian singer and former Neighbors actress Holly Valance (who also appeared briefly on Prison Break as a Russian cohort of Wentworth Miller’s, if you were a fan of that show, which I sort of was, then wasn’t, then maybe was again, and then ultimately really was not).
If this dress really were Venetian blinds, as its fervent dream seems to be, then they’d be the light-diffusing kind — the one where putting them down doesn’t REALLY block out everything, but it gives you the IMPRESSION that it does so that you can go about your business making omelets without pants on, or whatever, and not be self-conscious about your hobby. Except I think in this case, a little self-consciousness might’ve been in order, because now I am intimately aware that her chest has been turned into a Denny’s short-stack. If I could add the visible belly-button into the breakfast metaphor, I would, but other than the awful “her coffee cup needs refilling” I couldn’t conjure one that made even a shred of sense. In sum: Check, please.
But can it beat this?