Fugger: Drew Barrymore

NYC Ballet Gala Awkward Carpet: Drew Barrymore


So…

… I’m guessing this serves as her official announcement?

[Photo: Getty]

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Fug the Cover: Drew Barrymore


Everything about this cover so stiff and awkward.

How ironic that the headline says “It’s Drew!” when in fact nothing about this photo bespeaks Drew Barrymore to me except the fact that she provided its original genetic material. Her hands look like the photographer walked up to her, placed them there, and said, “IF YOU MOVE THAT HAND ONE MORE TIME I SWEAR I’LL TURN THIS CAR AROUND.” She also looks sedated, and possibly also severely Photoshopped, into an expression of supreme sleepy smuggery. And if they were going to monkey with her face, why didn’t they adjust the fact that the shirt makes her left boob look like it’s being arrested by an ace bandage?

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Unfug It Up: Drew Barrymore


This happened pre-SAGs, but we need to go here:

When I first saw this — last week — I thought it was A HOT MESS. But now that I’m coming back to it, I’m not nearly so mad. In fact, I think the whole thing could be saved if it were just a mini-dress. SUCH AN EASY FIX, DREW. Next, we need to do something about your hair…

But what do you think, Fug Nation? Fixable? Put on your styling caps.

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Emmy Awards Fug Ceremony: Drew Barrymore


There is a lot going on in this picture:

All I know is, Drew Barrymore is SO LUCKY that Kyle Chandler won this award for best actor, because I think the world was in the middle of Tweeting, “OMG, WTF is Drew Barrymore wearing and WHY CAN’T SHE EVER DRESS HERSELF FOR AN AWARDS CEREMONY” but then immediately had to start over and instead Tweet, “KYLE CHANDLER!!!!!!!!” And, okay, by “the world,” I mean “me,” but I’m sure I wasn’t alone, because  A) Kyle Chandler is awesome, and B) This looks like what would happen if a flapper got some bad moonshine and ended up procreating with a shower curtain.

PS: Could someone just remind Drew — who I actually don’t even dislike, but while we’re at it, I think this is important — that she didn’t INVENT Charlie’s Angels? The rest of us will thank you.

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Fug Madness 2011: Round Two, Cher Bracket


HOUSEKEEPING: Are you still having issues with voting? Try commenting first and seeing if it helps. That being said, ALLEGEDLY the polls should be working fine right now, so cross your fingers!

(1) TAYLOR MOMSEN vs. (9) DIANE KRUGER

Taylor Momsen is two for two in having photos that need to be censored, or put under a jump so as to not offend.

Congratulations?

This time, for language:

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Fug Madness 2011, Round One: Cher Bracket


And so it begins! Remember, the photos we use are just illustrative (and to, we hope, make an entertaining post). We encourage you always to check the contestants’ archives on this site — easily found by clicking here and starting to type the person’s name into the Featured Fuggers search box, or through links within these posts themselves — and even maybe Google them before you vote (remember, eligibility is from after last year’s Oscars up through Feb. 28, a.k.a., this year’s Oscars). If you want. Maybe you just like to close your eyes and click; I don’t know your life.

Here we go…

(1) TAYLOR MOMSEN vs. (16) JESSICA SZOHR

In the battle of the Forgotten Gossip Girls, let’s start with Vanessa From Brooklyn. Sidebar: We call La Szohr that because, as part of that Sobe campaign for which she shot the nude pics, her radio spots did not say, “Hi, it’s Vanessa from Gossip Girl.” Instead, they said, “It’s Vanessa… from Brooklyn,” with nary a mention of the show’s name, which is both hilarious and very conspicuous.

Also conspicuous: her underboob.

Jessica Szohr

But I guess it makes sense. The girl likes netting — as we all recall from this cracked-out shirt, and her Oscars “dress,” of course – and she likes making you look at her boobs, which we recall from this:

Jessica Szohr

I ASSUME that thing stayed up all night, since we didn’t hear any scandalous Us Weekly blurbs noting Vanessa from Brooklyn turning into Vanessa from Hookerlyn, but I bet it was a close call.  As much as she cherishes her lady-assets is how much I wish she would prize her hair, as it’s a hot mess here and doesn’t look much better when she top-knots it, not to mention how ratty it looks if/when Vanessa from Brooklyn makes an appearance on the CW.

But is all this enough to unseat top seed Taylor Momsen? They share a disregard for their hair and a predisposition for transparency. But to date, Szohr has yet to do this. Prepare yourselves:

I actually had to censor this photo

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