One tragic side effect of the cancellation of All My Children is that we will no longer get to see the resplendent nuttery of Opal Cortlandt:
I mean, that is a GOWN. It’s not some piddly little translucent thing, or hotpants, or even a frock. It is a full-on fiddle-dee-dee Daughters of the American Revolution Annual Silent Auction and Waltzathon saloon-prom Miss County Fair 1981 gown, and it is hilarious. In my head, whenever she entered the room, that riff from “The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly” played, and then six dudes got in a fight over cards with no numbers on them that resulted in an upended table,bottles breaking over people’s heads, and a dude being slid on his stomach down the length of a bar until his head pierced the wall. Somebody please invite Jill to a bunch of parties after AMC goes dark so that we’re not deprived of whatever else she has cooking in her closet.
