4 photos in galleryOn our twitter, Fug National @NicNarrates said that Gywnnie here looks like she’s “going to the gyno…in space.” Which is so apt, and so funny, that I wish I had thought of it myself. Because SHE DOES. Although I don’t know about you, but I try to keep my side-boob wrangled at the gyno. At least until it’s time for my side-boob exam.
[Photos: Getty]
-140x210.jpg "\"American Woman: Fashioning A National Identity\" Met Gala - Arrivals")
Comments (81):
I think she looks great. Love the dress!
I don’t like the hair, but other than that, I love what she is wearing/
What a hot mess. Just NO.
Oof. No. This makes me so sad. But “Lefty here is considering making a run for it” made me spit-take once I realized which one was Lefty. Awesome.
I hate everything about this.
Uch. Just tacky.
And Gwynnie may be in great shape, but her girls are not as perky as she THINKS they are. Not nearly perky enough for that dress, at least.
OR this one:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/07/gwyneth-paltrow-sideboob_n_1494682.html?ref=celebrity&ir=Celebrity
Agreed. Her body looks AMAZING after having two kids, and let’s face it, amazing for just about anyone. (I would kill for those legs.)
That being said, @NicNarrates was completely dead on. Visiting the Gyno in space. I vote we outlaw side boob in space, because apparently it’s turning into a trend here on earth and no one is doing anything about it. Ugh.
Agree with Karen. It’s no diss – she’s had two kids after all. But she’s past the stage where braless is a good idea.
I love this dress, but not on Gwyneth. Completely age-inappropriate.
Yes – she’s stunning, but this just doesn’t work. (And I think I’d hate it on everyone, not just her.)
I kind of like it?
I don’t mind it, I feel there are some construction issues though, mainly the boobage and the pockets and we could do with a little less danger of Count Crotchula appearing.
But the idea was there and it could’ve been delightfully space-age 60′s.
I presume her date was inside those pockets?
Bad.
The first pic, she looks like one of those hairless cats in a homemade dress.
Hairless cat – oh, so mean. And so hilarious.
Amanda, you’re the best. “Hairless cat in a homemade dress” made me laugh so much I’m still crying. That comment is so on the money. I would love to know how she can look so smug in that getup.
I’m getting sick of side-boob, under-boob and all the rest of it. Who decided this was the edge of fashion? It’s the edge of something but not the edge of fash (HA!) Epic Fail, GP. Epic.
Just awful. There is absolutely nothing redeeming about this whole look. With the exception of the fact that it allowed for the hairless cat comment, which was awesome.
Nah. Too bland and sterile. Perfect for space.
At least on the Daily Fail, they were RAVING about this dress, which more than blows my mind. It’s atrocious, and I hate all overly voluminous skirts, particularly any that have even a little of the mullet look going. SO BAD.
Sevigny was crazy good, this is crazy bad. And I do agree that she’s past the age where this is sexy & cute. Her girls are ok, but not side-boob ok. Her body is absolutely great of course, but I have the impression this dress was chosen precisely to highlight it.
I would like it without the side boob nonsense. Make the top a little wider and more supportive, and this would be awesome.
This dress borders on the obscene. Just gross (not to mention that the “dress” looks like something that would get you kicked off of Project Runway). Ickers.
Yes! Totally looks like a Project Runway fail! Even if the challenge was space age casino waitress. Just terrible!!
Best definition achieved : )
Weird and not flattering at all. Even if Boobs Leglsy was wearing it, I’d still hate it.
GP needs to stop going braless. I, like her, am rather small-chested, but hello! We’re not 18 anymore and they’re not up high like they used to be.
Please, I beg of you, get to Mary Kate Olsen, I need your opinions on her severa granny look.
That was supposed to be “severe granny look” but I guess the sideboob up there rendered me unable to spell.
No. Big no all around. Her face looks lovely, she has very nice skin but from the neck down, complete fail.
So the theme was “Impossible Conversations” about Prada. And this is a Prada dress presumably made for the occasion. NOW IT ALL MAKES SENSE.
Gwyneth’s next “goal”: Ice dancing gold medal at the 2014 Winter Olympics
I don’t hate it, mainly because I would love for my legs to look like that.
Ugh. This is foul, bad color, bad shape, bad fabric, just bad.
But damn I wish I could be bothered to work out like she does if it meant my legs would look like that.
It makes her look cheap, which is not something she ever looks, even in lesser brands.
I was thinking the same thing! Her new incarnation as “Martha Stewart, But Richer and Prettier” may annoy the crap out of me, but in general she tends to look pulled-together and elegant. This just looks desperate.
A little more boob coverage on the sides & more length on the skirt & I like it. I’m pretty much always down with this particular color… minus the garbage glued onto the sides.
Gyno, . . . something not right about this design as well.
This looks…Amateur.
Fighting the tide… other than the pockets, I love it.
Her face is flawless. SIDE BOOB IS NEVER OKAY.
This is Prada? God, I thought Goop’s bestie Stella ran this up in about 7 minutes and forgot to attach the back of the bodice and the skirt. This is way, WAY too short for going out in public. Not “too short for her age”, either. Just too damn short.
I think only one person wore a Stella Abomination last night and that was M.I.A in some unGodly tropical print formal short suit get-up. It made me cry.
Pretty sure I saw that Cameron Diaz was also in Stella McCartney.
I thought it was a Stella Special too. This is not what I think of when I think of Prada, and I mean that in a bad way.
I think she looks like she’s trying too hard. The dress looks so cheap and tacky/tacked-together. Satin—if Ms. Goop cannot pull it off with her banging body, I don’t think anyone can. I also don’t think this particular shade of blonde is very flattering to her skin tone. Her smile is lovely and she looks great aside from the garment.
I agree with you on the hair, I think she needs to start toning down the vibrant blonde and go with something a little less harsh. She is very tan and shiny looking lately, which shows all the smoking/suntan lines – don’t get me wrong, I still think she is beautiful, but she could be even more so.
I don’t like this at all, but to be fair, I have a hard time liking anything she wears because I simply can’t stand her.
I second that. I still think the dress on its own is godawful. But for me it didn’t have a prayer because it’s on her. It was doomed from the start.
Gwyneth, dear, your clavicles are showing.
It just looks homemade to me, which is my biggest issue with it. I really don’t mind the dress in theory, but the fug girls are right- it looks like there was a glue gun involved and that the bodice pattern pieces weren’t cut out QUITE right. Like a home ec project that was thrown together the night before it was due.
Though, if I’m being really honest, the 5-year-old inside of me ADORES the pockets.
This is just plain terrible. She’s got an amazing body, but this is not the right way to show it off.
Doesn’t fit at all. Wouldn’t fit anyone. Bad.
I know this dress must cost more than my (old) car and all that, but it looks homemade (by a legally blind seamstress). The stupid pocket (I swear I saw it at Michael’s) is not helping. And the dress achieves the impossible–it makes Gwyneth’s butt look big (maybe that _was_ the idea?).
It’s a very, very fancy apron.
fanciest apron ever
It’s a fug-tastrophe.
I hate everything about this. Just a terrible look from tip to toe. But can we talk about her hair? I am SO SICK of the Gwyneth hair — center part, limp, and straight as a stick (or occasionally, as here, pulled back into a super tight bun). She has gorgeous hair, but she really needs to mix up the styling from time to time. She is in a Jennifer Aniston-level style rut when it comes to her hair.
If it were tighter, Heidi Klum would be green with envy. After all, Heidi is the Queen of the short, tight and shiny dress.
Now that Goop brought it up, what would one wear at an OB-GYN appointment in deep space?
I saw another shot from straight on and even then you could see lefty. That’s pretty bad!
Sorry to be terribly old-fashioned but doesn’t black tie mean long dresses? Ie some sort of coverage? That looks like a beach cover up.
http://www.ramblingmuse.com
Girl, NO. I prefer to think maybe she had something else to wear but the ghost of Liz Taylor spilled wine on her dress too, and so she had to come up with something fast. I would like to think Chris Martin whipped the tablecloth off a craft services table, stole some of his bandmates guitar picks, and taped that thing together with some spit and bubblegum. Cuz good hubbies are like that.
Apart from everything else that’s wrong with it, which is, well, everything… why does no one who cares about this woman ever tell her that yes, small breasts can need a brassiere, and yours always have, so stop it? I mean would that really be so hard?
Wow, her legs are really amazing.
I hate the dress though.
This dress is making me feel dirty. Her skin color is not helping.
The hairless cat comment will make me laugh for days, thanks Amanda!
The woman fixing her dress in the background seems cool, like I’d want to go get a martini with her and giggle about the apron.
Prada, huh? I would have guessed Stella McCrapney, but Prada’s nearly as overrated. In the end, it doesn’t matter how good your face, bod, or boobs, if the dress is this hideous.
I dunno, I really do appreciate her not wanting to look like everyone else. If only she would stand up straight, she could pull these looks off.
I actually like this one.
This is just too darn short, even if she has nice legs. Save them for the beach. That may sound old fogey of me, but so be it.
Her boobs are droopy in this.
Her shoulders look like they need to eat a steak. Too skinny boney.
It’s like she’s PROUD of the fact that she’s bony and has a flat chest that droops a little. Is she trying to convince us that this looks good?
diagnosis: Tryingwaytoogooddamnharditis. apply Getacluex generously three times a day.
Getting closer to the physique of a coat hanger everyday, Goopers
You’ll be rid of those chicken cutlets by September.
When I was six, I made a dress for my Barbie out of left-over scraps from my sister’s pale, blue satin wedding dress. It didn’t hang well.
Oh, wait….
She always had droopy boobs, but it looks like they have been filled somewhat. I can’t stand her. She is on my throat punch list.
Makes me think of the jetsons
Because I can’t stand her, this delights me (in a “haha, not everything Goop does is perfect!” sort of way–is that childish of me??) She’s just trying SO HARD. Yes, her body is nearly perfect. She doesn’t need a hospital gown to show that off. Blech.
This is dreadful, but it would be LESS dreadful if it were ironed correctly. Are these supposed to be couture? Surely they have someone who can iron a seam flat.
Side note: this is the second time tonight that I’ve commented on the dreadful ironing. The transformation is complete; I am my grandmother.
This is retarded.
Dare I say it, Gwynnie? You’re almost 40. The ship has sailed for you on dresses like these. On Selena Gomez or even Taylor Swift: this dress may have actually looked cute. On Gwyneth: we’re headed for mutton-dressed-as-lamb territory.
My eyes kept going to her legs, arms, shoulders and side mammary glands. Her body looks amazing. But I’m afraid if she sneezes we’re going to see something underneath that only the gyno from outer space should see.