8 photos in galleryHonestly, I feel like this could have been TERRIBLE. And yet it was kind of entertaining, not only because Madge closed this thing with “Like a Prayer,” which is possibly my favorite Madonna song ever. Although I also love “Express Yourself.” And who doesn’t have fond memories of roller-skating to “Material Girl,” other than the many of you who were not born around the same time that I was? Although my fond memories are less about skating and more about clinging to the wall of the rink and screeching, “I LOVE THIS SONG” to my friend Cheri as she skated past. What I’m saying, though, is that I don’t think any of us expect the Super Bowl halftime show to be a bastion of good taste and classy ensembles. Like, this is an event which is best known for Janet Jackson’s nipple shield — the more headdresses, the better. Let’s take a closer look.
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Did it look to anyone else like Madonna was wearing shoes she could barely walk in, let alone dance in? I mean, if you’re going to keep yourself in insane shape AND mime your songs, presumably you’re at least aiming to be able to dance, right? So I’m blaming the shoes.
It could very well be partially the shoes, but she also had a hamstring injury. so I’m impressed that she was up there dancing around like that.
I did not know that about the injury. Explains the sort of awkward dancing.
Wondered about that, too, thanks for the update. Ouch.
Yes!!! I kept saying, “This woman can dance!! Why is she wearing heels that she cannot even dance in?? I can dance better than that, and I am almost her age!!”
Yeah, she was definitely having an issue with the shoes. She almost fell off the bleacher while trying to step up on it. And some of her dance moves looked awkward and stiff, like her feet were hurting.
Cee-Lo’s sequined black caftan was just fantastic, especially since I gleaned from SNL the night before that Cee-Lo loves caftans.
When Cee-lo changed into his caftan, I clapped and squealed “Chocolate Chunk Midget Priest of Darkness!”
That caftan is what I imagine Andre Leon Talley will wear to Anna Wintour’s funeral someday.
Thank you for not complaining about her age or her physical imperfections! You’d think any lady over 50 should be forced into burqas the way people talk about her. I loved her costumes, and the throne is CLASSIC Madonna. Did she lip-synch? I heard some chatter about that but it’s not really her style. I’ve seen her live and she does sound like that…
Yes, she lip synched. Painfully obvious.
But that being said, it’s not totally abnormal for performances in venues that large to be lip synched. But the problem is, enough people have heard Madonna sing live – whether in person or from broadcasted performance – that it was really obvious that wasn’t her live voice.
That part disappointed me – because one of the many things that separates her from many other of the young pop starlets is that she can sing, and quite well. I think she was more concerned with pageant than performance – as in this was one huge video for her. So she sacrificed vocals for visuals.
She should have just called Prince for advice. He is just as known for flamboyant stage performance, yet he still sang live (in the pouring rain) and kicked butt. All she had to do was sing well with moderate dance steps (I can’t imagine she dances as well as she used to – it’s just age and the profession catching up to her, she is human) and she would have been so much better received.
I will admit, though, I thoroughly enjoyed her over-the-top entrance and costuming.
Like a Prayer was live (you can hear her breath intakes and not hitting all of the higher notes). But I can’t imagine anyone singing all live while doing cartwheels and the like. Madonna has always valued full theatrical performances over vocal showcases, so it wasn’t surprising. Very impressive, all in all.
I love Madonna, but one thing she’s not famous for is her amazing singing voice. She has so much vocal tension you can hear it even on her studio albums. She’s famous for putting together amazing performances, and for the “Halftime Show” genre, I think this was one.
Also, her dancing used to be great but she’s like a thousand years old now, so shoes or no, that probably ain’t happening.
When you go to a concert the are equipment checks and sound checks and mic checks. When you do the superbowl halftime show you get 2 mins and “GO”. Lip Syncing is par for the course. It is not a venue set up for a concert. It is set up for a superbowl game. I know it has been done -but really it is the exception. I don’t think Prince’s show was much different. And I have to disagree. Madge has never had strong vocals. She’s always been an entertainer extraordinaire. So her decision to sync was 100% expected IMO.
Chasmosaur, thanks for recalling the Prince halftime show in 2007. Best SB halftime show I can remember — which, I know, isn’t saying much.
But I’ve seen him live, and his performance that day was on par.
Actually, almost every half-time super bowl performance is playback!
Given the very little time they have to put together the stage, there’s no time left to soundcheck… Michael Jackson and even Prince did lip-sync, Black Eyed Peas did it live and it sucked! Madonna does not use playback in her concerts, but at the SB there’s not really the choice
I completely agree Chasmosaur. She should have given a little on the over the top pagentry and focused more on the music. Honestly, I was a little bored and couldn’t follow what she was doing with the show. She went from Cleopatra to cheerleader to nun……..
It’s tricky singing live in a stadium because of the echo. A lot of Star Spangled Banners are lip synched/pre-recorded for that reason.
She injured herself in rehearsals so I think that had a lot to do with the stiff movements. Overall I was pleasantly surprised – M looked like she was having fun, the Givenchy was fabulous, and her ability to put on a visual feast of a show is unmatched. Best halftime show in years.
I didn’t realize that. That explains so much.
I was so glad she didn’t slut it up in costume or moves that I was blessing her for the whole thing anyway – but I thought she looked great, I loved that she was willing to share the stage with Niki, nameless girl who fell/flipped off the stage and Cee-Lo (and yes, Annie, Cee-Lo does LOVE a caftan, usually of the sparkly lame or sparkly sequinned type); and Cee-Lo SOUNDED great.
And. being a 50+ woman myself who has had to give up my 41/2 heels for 3 1/2 inch heels (the beginning of the end, I say); I think Madonna handled herself REMARKABLY well on her 4 1/2 inchers.
I will still wear shoes that high, but just for perching on bar stools or dangling enticingly out from under a table at a restaurant. My dancing days in those kinds of shoes are over. The joints just don’t work the same, no matter how good shape you’re in! And I think Madonna may be learning the same…
I think Madonna should be happy being Madonna the taught and ageless pop icon, and perhaps leave the flashy stage shows to the younger ones. It felt forced and I hate her new song.
I didn’t watch it as I missed the BBC’s coverage last night but I can’t believe Madonna lip synched. Just to shut up Elton John and David whatshisname I really wish she had sung properly.
It was a lot less bad than these things tend to be. And of course it’s about spectacle. Nobody buys tickets for or tunes in to the broadcast of the NFL’s Annual Festival of Wretched Excess expecting anything else. You just have to accept it within its own very peculiar context. Though I must admit I did snort margarita out my nose when the galley-slaves slow-marched onto the field. That really was kinda hilarious.
It was not as bad as I thought it would be – can we just rejoice that she didn’t attempt to perform in a freaky bondage-inspired leather leotard? So glad she kept is mostly covered up.
As for MIA, what was the point of flipping the bird? Trying for a little controversy, maybe hoping the outcry from regular folks in flyover country would get your name out there? Please.
I’m still laughing about the Will Ferrell/Richard Simmons love child. I thought this was a pretty entertaining half time show. I think pop singers (whether lip synching or not) put on the best half time shows. It’s really all about the visuals. And Madonna delivered. And yes, I believe she pulled a hamstring and was limited in her dance movement which was obvious, but she worked it out. I loved hearing the old stuff, but the new song (and the accompanying pom poms) were better suited to someone much, much younger.
Hilarious post. Wondering if it would be funnier if I had actually watched the halftime show. Because… I just couldn’t. Tragic celebration of mediocrity.
Loved the costumes though. Completely over the top as they should be.
Thank you. Looking at the stills was bad enough.
I don’t understand why she keeps putting herself through stuff like this. When you have to cover up your granny hands all the time out of some ridiculous embarrassment over not being a 25-year-old piece anymore is the time you should just stop.
Somewhere both Toni Basil and Gwen Stefani were looking at the cheerleaders and being all “girl please, been there and done that.”
I thought the first half of the show was mediocre and lethargic and I didn’t like the new song at all. I wish Nicki Minaj had been given more singing time (of one of her own songs…preferably Superbass) because I get a kick out of her. MIA managed to out-desperate Madonna, which I didn’t think possible. Things were greatly improved by Cee-Lo and Like a Prayer, even if Cee-Lo was dressed as a sparkly Darth Vadar.
The costumes were great. I don’t mind that she lip-synched, because Madonna does not have a great singing voice. Her concert vocals were always heavily backed with numerous back-up singers and layered with recorded tracks. The illusion of the Madonna of the 90s was *almost* there, except that I kept sucking my breath in when she would stumble. I don’t consider her old, but I didn’t want her to fall in those totally impractical boots and break a hip on live TV.
When you spend the whole time wishing that someone (already injured) won’t break a hip it’s time to change the concert moves. Not starting pom-pom new gigs. If she was charismatic and nice, I would probably consider this endrearing. But she is so bicthy that I feel no pain for her, sorry to say. It was painful to watch but… the old songs still make me smile.
Oh, I love bitchy Madonna! I wouldn’t have her any other way. She’s always said what she thinks and never played nice if she wasn’t honestly feeling it. It’s so much more fun to me to see her act slightly bad than to see all of those ‘oh, I love everyone so much’ stars. No, thank you.
Word to MIA: Oh honey, I really wouldn’t want to be you. Madonna promised the network execs and “inappropriate free” half time show, and you did WHAT? I know you are young and all that, but have you no idea how powerful Madonna is in the music biz? You do not, I repeat NOT mess with a woman like this. Unless of course, your career ambition includes a gig where you are saying “do you want fries with that?” a lot. Hope you enjoyed your time in the spotlight while it lasted.
She’s 36!!!! In other words: TOTALLY OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER.
And a mother.
Urgh!!!
and married to a very rich man
I can’t bear that sort of faux posturing. It’s not STREET, it’s just silly.
I loved it – from the She-Ra (Princess of Power!) headdress to the fitted gospel glittery gown. She looked gorgeous and age appropriate.
She-Ra is good. Myself, I immediately thought “Wagner opera” when I saw the headdress.
THANK YOU! I’m so glad someone else thought of She-Ra when she showed up in that headdress. It’s spot-on Princess of Power.
I did not see the halftime show — or any part of the Super Bowl, for that matter — but I love this post, Jessica! Love child of Richard Simmons and Will Ferrell… it’s funny ’cause it’s true.
It occurred to me as Cee Lo joined her for “Like A Prayer” that he might be the black Jesus from that music video all grown up. MIND BLOWN.
The Dish Network pulled some major shenanigans last night and cut out during the half time show so I missed all put the very last part when C-Low come out. I was going to Youtube it but now I don’t think I need to.
Hmm, my husband and I seem to be the only people on the planet who just laughed through this entire thing and thought M.I.A. flashing her panties and flipping the bird was the best part.
i certainly enjoyed it better than the rest of gladiator cheerleaders performing silly moves.
That drum line was made up of the drum lines from four local high schools. Can you even imagine? As a former band geek, I can’t fathom performing in the Super Bowl halftime show. With MADONNA no less.
Shout out to the teenagers!
WORD. I thought it was mighty cool.
I thought the exact same thing about the local choir. HOW AMAZING!!!!!
I agree, the local band & choir were GREAT! Kudos!!!
That is awesome!! I’ll be sure to tell my band geek son!
I was in high school when Madonna came about and so I really prefer all those fun pop 80s songs she had. Out of all those songs, Like a Prayer was my least favorite! So, not really impressed with the song choices at all. Her performance was fine…she’s in fantastic shape and looked good while moving around.
I had (and still have) no idea who MIA is and don’t care.
That Simmons/Ferrell love child was pretty impressive bouncing around on the tightrope.
I can do without all the visual stuff though. I just like to hear a person/group sing and enjoy it.
I think I must be the only child of the 80s on the planet who generally enjoys Madonna’s songs but thinks “Like a Prayer” is just kinda meh. Overall, I think the show was well done for being of the genre Broadcast Television Spectacle, and I hope I look that good when I hit 53. She definitely lip synched at least part of it, but I thought for sure she was live for at least part of it.
Also, I am old. I had no idea who those other people were until seeing this post, and even then I just went “Who? Get off my lawn!”
M.I.A. is definitely resurfacing! GO check out her new vid “Bad Girls”. It will change your life, as surely as it changed mine.
I don’t know about life-changing, but I did enjoy the video. Looking forward to her new album. I still think M.I.A. is cool and kept up with her post-Kala. *shrug*
I was just happy to see that she had all her gristly bits covered up with long gloves and thigh high boots. And her face looked nice and plumped up.
I’m starting to think there must be something really wild going on with her hands. Like scales or feathers or something.
Nothing wild. Just the prominent veins, age spots, and papery skin that we will all end up with. The main way to avoid it is dying young.
Off to moisturize the hands.
Oh, my freaking god. Another reason to be glad i didn’t watch. Her time is so over.
**** applause **** Those were some of the funniest comments I have EVER read on this site! And I’ve been reading a long time! Russell Simmons – BWAH!
I missed the entire thing, but I asked my husband how Madonna was. He said, “CeeLo showed up in sparkles.” And that answered my question.
I think I love your husband!
We noted the Avrilness of the cheerleader song, and her Xena-like skirt and arm bands. Still, face and figure looked great, though the costume was a bit boring. (As my sis said, “She IS a mom now.”) And to do acrobatics on bleachers on live, world-wide tv takes cojones grandes.
Your comments were pretty much exactly what I was thinking during the entire show. Nice mind meld.
I thought there were several crotch-tacular moments that made me cringe as I watched with my kids.
Also, my son’s 12-year old friend saw the Roman costumes as proof that Madonna is “like, 500 years old.” Sigh.
With every squat and crotch shot, I thought (simultaneously): “You are too old for this” and “Ewwwww!” Tina Turner did it so much better…
Nah, I roller-skated to “Because” by the Dave Clark Five. Good times, good times…
Does Madonna ever look at herself in the mirror and say, “I look silly.”? No, apparently not.
Here’s the thing – in no way do I, (or would I ever), fault Madonna as she is seriously kick ass for any age. But……Cheerleaders? Being carried in by slaves? Madge, you taught these people how to be relevant – you need to raise the bar.
Wow.
The Super Bowl halftime show can’t really be taken out of context, can it? It’s a singular thing. Missing it means you’ll see and hear things that hint at a kind of shared trauma (” … something about gladiators. Cartwheels? And then everything went black. Again.”), as if the audience were trapped into seeing it, glued to their sofa cushions by a malicious double dose of carbs and curiosity.
Because I did miss it. I didn’t watch any of the Super Bowl this year. Instead I went shopping with my best friend. While Madge was doing her thing, we were enjoying our own halftime in a restaurant, surrounded by all our new stuff (mostly shoes). So I guess I wouldn’t say I really missed it.
Hats off to Madonna, though. Who knew that “play the Super Bowl” was on her bucket list? Been there now, Madge, done that!
I have always loved Franca Sozanni. Who knew she could dance?!
The production value and design of Madonna’s half-time show were great, but she should have done the whole thing live. It is not unusual for Super Bowl performers to sing live: U2, Springsteen, Rolling Stones, Diana Ross, and Black Eyed Peas were all live.
I liked the very beginning and the very end, where it appeared she was actually singing a bit, but the middle was a bit of an overblown lip-synch, off-balance bore.
The slip off the bleachers was not such a big deal, but her choreography was, mostly left to be handled by all the other dancers. She did have energy, and was clearly having fun, but I wanted Madonna, not Madonna and LFMAO and Nicki Minaj and MIA. That LFMAO dance sequence was the lamest dance ever at the Super Bowl.
Madge should not have been so generous involving others to the extent she did. She kind of saved it with “Like A Prayer” at the end, but I would give it a B-. Not her best.
I don’t care for her, but she knocked it out of the park – for what a SuperBowl halftime is anyway. Though I’d normally be the one to jump on the anti-Madonna bandwagon, I’m not joining the haters on this one. Best halftime in years … you know, if you like that sort of thing. Costumes were divine and her hair and makeup were superb.
Okay, so when that whole crazy Roman/Cleopatra-on-roids thing came out, how much did you want it to turn out to be SWINTON instead?
Because that that’s how she got to the Baftas last year, right?
OMG IF SWINTON came out that would bring on the Mayan Apocolypse – early – that would be fantastic! Sigh.
It’s Sozzani. But good one. Sit down Madonna.
Where would she be without (more talented) brown people?
Did anybody see her attempt a wheelbarrow with one leg….and wobble out of it..?? Funniest thing I’ve seen in YEARS on TV, let alone the superbowl halftime.
It made me sad to see her resort to using younger pop artists to remain relevant and connect with her audience. But, she has been around for such a long time now, it figures she would do that. I would give her more credit for awesomeness – except that I’ve seen her recent interviews (esp. Graham Norton) and she has clearly disappeared up her own backside. Sad to see. Finally, thanks Fug Girls for cracking me up (as ever) with this hilarious post! You Rule.
Yes, yes…all of these things! The misbegotten wheelbarrow had me rolling.
Madonna in a cassock will never not be funny.
Like a virgin viking.
I couldn’t believe the entrance! I’m hoping it was an homage to Liz Taylor’s/Cleopatra’s entrance in to Rome not a “I can do that better.”
Cuz Madge honey, you ain’t Liz.
I enjoyed Madonna, Cee Lo & Nicki! Didn’t care for the others! I LOVED MADONNA’S COSTUMES! The headpiece & boots were AWESOME! WANT! She looked super cute in the black minidress & the long sparkly gown! COVET! Her hair & makeup were perfect! LOVE! And, I enjoyed the singing, the dancing & the special effects!
My boyfriend, who’s a music journalist, wrote: “Spectacular, if ridiculous, Madonna’s Halftime Performance… And, “World Peace”? What?” I laughed out loud when I read it!
Color me confused on the “World Peace” thing, too.
My brother-in-law Facebooked that while we were having cocktails yesterday, and my friend’s husband confirmed that it was a real thing that had just happened. At the Super Bowl. Because of Madonna.
So, you know. If she’s done nothing else, at least Madge has brought us World Peace.
HA. I forgot about World Peace. Being in LA, we all made a Ron Artest joke.
If I’d been actually at the SB, I think I would have watched the blue screens on the ground the whole time – those were way cool.
Seriously, she looked like Rickey Henderson playing for the Mets. Of course, he was playing because he loved the game, and she was playing for … Whirled Peas (they misspelled it).
Put it in the spin cycle, Madge. It’s washed up
Slow clap for a Rickey Henderson reference!
i think Givenchy made a DISASTER with her outfit, base on Shera/ gladiator!!!!!!
ans the hair…..was so Franca Sozzani, was that hair to honour Vogue?
of course the show and dancing was PERFECT!!!!!
http://www.lafeegothique.com
I think my favorite comment so far was that Cee-Lo looked like he teaches at Disco Hogwarts. Hee!
When Cee Lo first showed up in the drum major’s outfit, I swore up and down I was seeing Cedric the Entertainer (esp from the so bad it’s great movie “Man of the House” with Tommy Lee Jones). Deja vu!
Why are so many people complaining about her dancing in such high shoes if she has an injury and is 53? If she’d worn anything lower you’d all be saying she should put up with the pain and wear the highest heels possible. Madonna’s a major music legend who’s been putting up with crap and bitching ever since the early 80′s and SHE’S STILL GOING!! She may well be doing it in a wheelchair in 30 years. A fabulous wheelchair.
I actually rather liked the performance itself, costumes and all. Her new song is absolutely awful, but at least “Like a Prayer” got some much-needed airtime.
One of the radio stations where I live described Cee-Lo’s outfit as a “sequined snuggie,” and that has just made it the best thing ever in my mind. I can totally see him going home and hanging on the couch for the rest of the night in it, drinking a beer and munching potato chips while watching reruns of Lost or something. I would.
Evil bitch. When will she go away.
If we never had Madge, most likely music would be much better today.
She forged the way for pushy people with very little or no talent, lip syncing, lots of smoke an mirrors extravaganzas to hide the lack of voice or talent.
Remember she really sounds like minnie mouse on helium.
She’s looking more like Mae West everyday, nasty.
Lack of voice or talent has been in pop music since the days Dick Clark foisted Fabian, Frankie, and friends on the public. Madonna at least came up with a lot of catchy songs and videos in her heyday.
Don’t forget Annette, Carl. Whose Boobs knocked Darlene out of the competition, even though Darlene could actually sing!
Okay, I give Madge her props. The chick is 53 for God’s sake AND she had a hamstring injury. Adored the fabulously ridiculous costumes and loved the Madge and Cee Lo “Like A Prayer” duo. BUT I can’t help but remember Prince’s 2007 half-time show. It was freaking EPIC. No lip syncing. In the rain. The little guy is pretty much an ass, but the talent and showmanship simply cannot be denied nor equaled. He KILLED it. I want to go back in time and experience that live. Rain be damned.
Every time I see Madonna I have a feminist debate with myself. On the one hand women can of course wear anything they like at any age, and I would never agree with thise who would prefer to see her caftanned, however attempting to look and sound like a teenager when your 50+ isn’t really feminist either, shouldn’t a grown accomplished woman be able to contribute without dieting and exercising themselves joyless and dressing like a cheerleader. Her woeful singing voice and hideous dress sense (on and of stage) doesn’t cause me such conflict so I’ll stick to focusing on that.
The most expensive re-enactment of Leni Riefenstahl’s Triumph of the Will Nuremburg Rally as a musical, featuring tons of fascist imagery, no live music, assisted cartwheels and an obvious loss of balance, children chanting the equivalent of HEIL MADONNA!, and then Madge the Geriatric Cheerleader shaking her pompoms for an ironic World Peace. It’s like she didn’t realize that every aspect of the show made her look older, more frail, and less relevant musically and as a director. Elton John must be having a festival of his own, quoting Voltaire about how his one prayer to God, to make his enemies ridiculous, has been so generously answered.
That Elton John now only gets attention if he hates Madonna is sort of a loss in itself…
Cha Cha. This is KAOS. We do not fffffffffffffffffffft Madonna here!
Let us all pencil in a date for SuperBowl Sunday twenty years in the future (Mayan calendar be damned!) just to see Madonna and her Jazzy-electric scooter-wheelchair-in the bleachers-assisted cartwheels. I’ll bring the artocjple dip. Oops, that was supposed to be artichoke but my right hand shifted one key over and I rather liked the effect.
Count me in for the artocjple bowl party! Clap on clap off, Madonna!
I thought this was so awkward.
She could barely move in those heels, and when she did it was so jerky and stiff. I had major flashbacks to Britney’s notoriously sluggish MTV Awards performance. And the miming – my god what a waste of time. Either dance or sing. Not neither!
Perhaps I’m still smarting from her arrogant turn at the Golden Globes the other week, but I’m seriously over Madonna and wish she would disappear forever.
I think that dude was Christian Slater in a wig.
I enjoyed the show, but there are a few of us out there that could not help but notice some eerie similarities to Kylie Minogues’ Aphrodite Tour as well as her “X” Tour. Madonna needs some new inspiration.
I loved Nicki, Madonna, and M.I.A.’s hair!
I heart Madonna forever. We are the same age and I, too, have an ongoing feud with Elton, although he KNOWS I side with Jessica on the issue. Don’t even ask. Diana knew all about it. I think Madge, the alien warlord high priestess egyptian Michigan queen did a great job! Entrance throne PROVES she’s ready for Vegas. Come ON, why not? Okay. Give it ten years and she can join Bette and Cher and rake in the senior Diva bucks.
Prince’s halftime show > Madonna’s halftime show
I WANT THAT HEADDRESS. Somebody needs to make me that headdress and double-quick. If you do, I will wear it to work every day for a week. X my heart and everything.
In every performance pic I see of her, there is the “air out your junk” shot – foot up on something, knee turned out….just as Jessica Simpson can’t seem to close her mouth, Madonna appears not to be able to keep her legs closed.
People have probably moved on already, but this needs to be said: if you’re okay with Paul McCartney, The Rolling Stones and other old dudes still performing but have problem with Madonna doing the same, you’re a hypocrite. Performing all the way to the grave is every star’s right.
I was ALSO thinking “She-Ra, Princess Of Power” when I saw the headdress! Which, of course, means I love it. Headdresses for everybody!