I was all prepped to note that this felt like one of those treading water episodes — just closing certain opening off and opening other story lines up. And then the last five minutes happened, and they were actually very exciting.
Fug File: Revenge
First of all, apologies for the tardiness of this recap. I have had jury duty. This may surprise you, but it’s very difficult to recap an episode of Revenge while impaneled. “Hang on one super second, your honor. I’ll tell you all about my past jury service just as soon as I say this mean thing about Charlotte.” Also, apologies well in advance for the fact that I somehow forgot to get a shirtless picture of Jack this week, although there was shirtless Jack. I truly deserve to be prosecuted for that myself.
As I mentioned last week, I am only now watching Breaking Bad — I’m almost at the end of season four — and everyone was right: it is tremendous. And one of the tremendous things about it is that at the end of nearly every episode, you think, “how are Walt and Jesse going to get out of this?!?!” Whereas, with Revenge, nearly every episode ends with my praying that Emily’s comeuppance is swift and complete. I think this is, in part, because Emily is not sympathetic nor is she very bright. If you’re terrible, you at least have to be knee-deep in complex and satisfyingly twisty plot. Here, the only thing twisting are my hands as I wring them with irritation.
So. It turns out this episode was actually super entertaining.
I’d just like to note that I think we ALL suspected that Aidan was playing Victoria. Poor Victoria: her long-lost son is PROBABLY not really her long-lost son at all (I decided that Patrick is actually a Fed, investigating the Graysons for 1-34 of the felonies they’ve committed over the last 30 years); her actual son is a mouth-breather hellbent on marrying their sociopath neighbor; she hates her husband and he hates her; Charlotte. Anyhoodle, when we left off, Emily decided she wanted to see if she could get Conrad to confess his myriad sins, using the heavenly influences of Father James Le Gros. Obviously, this ended with Father James Le Gros dying in a fiery conflagration because it’s too early in the season to move the plot forward that much. The good news: NOLAN LOOKS INSANE. It’s awesome.